Many women, having matured, never manage to establish relationships with their parents. The only thing we can hope for is for our own children not to be like their mother. If, of course, a woman wants to have a child at all, because very often this is simply abandoned, since childhood and everything connected with it is painted mostly in negative tones. After all, parents are gods in the life of a small newborn, who, until the moment he gains independence, can make life both heaven and hell, filled with a feeling of abandonment, fears, grievances and misunderstanding. In psychotherapy, it is actually very easy to find out whether significant psychological traumas occurred in childhood - just ask how well you remember your childhood? It was good, but do you remember only isolated moments? Well, this means that your childhood was terrible and only scattered fragments remain from it. Because memory always amnesizes all the most difficult, terrible and unpleasant memories. All this radioactive material requires processing to resolve relationships with their own parents, as well as to become a good mother for their child. Because no matter how much they swear not to be like their parents, in the end they always raise their own children in the same way. It’s good if you notice this with horror not too late, when the baton of mistrust and resentment passed on by the parents will be picked up by your child. Why? You simply do not have any other scenario for motherhood other than absorbed with milk. Transactional analysis has long discovered that a holy trinity lives in every person: the inner Child - the ability to enjoy life, is responsible for happiness; the inner Parent - compliance with rules and moral standards, gaining effectiveness; the inner Adult - as if growing out of the inner child raised by the parent. The Inner Adult does not depend on a person’s age - often it remains unformed. Because it is the Adult who brings efficiency and happiness into a single whole in life. If your childhood was not happy, then your inner Child becomes the same - and it is this child who will never allow you to raise your own child normally. Because the offended and intimidated inner Child, seeing that your offspring is planning a happy childhood, will immediately present: “What? I only got toys through tears, but to him on a silver platter?” As a result, the inner Child will do everything so that your child’s life also pays off with a portion of bruises and bumps, instead of pies and crumpets. You are probably familiar with the sayings: “In our time, all this did not come so easily. Today’s children are completely dissolute and spoiled” - all these are words offended inner Children who did not have a happy childhood and, of course, out of revenge, they will not allow anyone to have it. Therefore, therapy of the inner Child, Parent and Adult is of decisive importance in the issue of relationships between children and parents. And, of course, special psychotechnologies for reconciliation with one’s own parents. To forgive and accept and finally understand your own parents. After all, for your children you are the source from which they will draw views and beliefs, form a general model of this world, learn the first words and the meanings behind them. And how will these flowers of life grow if the source that feeds them is itself polluted by grievances and claims??