Every person, like air, water and food, needs psychological strokes. The complete or partial absence of the required number of strokes has a huge impact on a person’s ability to establish close, friendly relationships. To correct this, it is important for a person to learn to receive only the strokes he needs. What are the obstacles? Claude Steiner formulated rules for the economy of strokes that prevent the free exchange of strokes: - a ban on asking for strokes, - a ban on receiving strokes, - a ban on offering strokes, - a ban on refusing strokes that a person does not like, - a ban for stroking yourself. It can be difficult to realize which strokes are needed more: physical or verbal? Do we need more kisses, hugs, encouraging pats on the shoulder, caresses, touches? Or do we need more verbal stroking in relation to physical form (beauty, smartness, “a healthy mind in a healthy body”), intelligence, courage, professionalism... If sometimes we ourselves have a hard time in What about our loved ones to sort this out? You can save a lot of energy, effort, time and other resources (they can be directed to other purposes) if you learn to directly ask for the strokes that you need and give the strokes that others ask from you. Otherwise, we spend a huge amount of effort, energy, and time trying to achieve strokes, often through new outfits, cars, jewelry, cosmetics, etc. “In a hungry year,” in extreme situations, when the “hunger” for strokes goes off scale, a person is ready to satisfy it also through receiving negative strokes, provoking loved ones with your actions and words. Hunger for strokes can arise due to the fact that a person is ready to accept strokes selectively, only from certain people. For example, a girl can only accept strokes from a brutal “prince on a white horse” and rejects them from ordinary attractive men, remaining alone to wait for her “ prince." Is sincerity necessary to convey a stroke? A stroke that is not sincere will most likely be rejected. The same fate should be with strokes with hidden criticism - “You are the fastest bastard” or those that arouse competition and emphatically compare - “You are the most attractive in this class” instead of the simple one - “You are the most attractive.” Are you familiar with the situation? Do you feel that you “Must” give a stroke, but in fact do not want it because you receive a request for a stroke from the “Victim” provoking “Salvation” and when you give this stroke, it can be called sincere? Everyone has the right not to give artificial, not sincere strokes. For a happy life, it is useful to develop the ability to: - receive and freely give strokes, - ask for strokes - when interacting with friends, colleagues, loved ones, “negotiate” with them about the unhindered exchange of strokes. - reject unacceptable strokes - give strokes to yourself