From the author: The topic was inspired by communication on the forum. I’m paying attention to it for one simple reason - the situation is very common. Briefly, the point is. A person, let’s call him a Guest, comes to a forum where the one who “offends” him is located. And not only him. The guest does not know how to react correctly to external influences in his direction and therefore quickly falls into a state of resentment - into the role of a victim. He is offended that he is not treated fairly, that they do not want to hear his opinion, etc. It is difficult for the victim to stand up for himself in such a situation, so he usually strives to unite with someone against the “offender” - the troll. The victim puts on three masks at once - roles: victim, savior, and persecutor. and without noticing it she becomes like a troll against whom she starts a war. Somewhere inside himself, the victim realizes the wrongness of his actions, and in order to justify himself to himself and to people. Strengthens the line of accusation against the troll, because of which she herself is forced to become a troll. Watching such games from the outside, you can only smile. But there is no time for smiles for those who do not know how to observe their actions from the outside, and are immersed in this game of ego - “offended victim.” This is a very sticky role, making Cartman's triangle a vicious circle from which the real one is difficult to escape. Prevention is always wiser than dealing with an existing situation. What to do? Learn to observe your emotional reactions when interacting with other people. Yes, people are not always right, but they always have the right to their emotions. Just as you have the right to choose how you react to other people’s outbursts of emotions addressed to you. Resentment is a natural indicator that you failed and allowed yourself to be filled with resentment - to be offended. It is impossible to offend an adequate adult person from the outside; he can become offended himself and make a decision about such a choice of response. Moreover, being on the Internet, it is easier for you to observe your dialogues with someone, just as easily as you can interrupt any unpleasant dialogue - just get off the Internet if you feel like you are losing your composure and immersed in emotions that are unpleasant to you. If you are honest If you can see yourself in a dialogue situation, you will be able to notice the very moment when you irresponsibly (in relation to yourself initially) begin to blame someone for your emotions. As soon as you feel the desire to blame, it means that you turn into an offended victim. You are transforming yourself! No one offends us, no one mocks us - people behave as they know how, but not always wisely. Every person, whether he knows it or not, always reveals his essence. You yourself choose the usual role of the victim. The Internet is actually a very good assistant in working with yourself. For example, you comment on a topic or communicate on a forum and express your point of view. People react differently to your opinion. And among the comments you notice aggressive attacks directed at you, immediately pay attention to your emotions and feelings. If someone else's words touch you to the quick, most likely resentment has already been born inside you, because you clearly expected a different reaction to your words. Resentment is difficult to recognize; it knows how to disguise itself. Very often it hides under an excessive desire to help everyone, under the staunch defense of truth, truth, justice, etc. At the same time, the offense remains an offense against an aggressive world that does not accept you as you are. The depth of such resentment is equal to the depth of your sacrifice. The stronger the resentment, the deeper you are in the victimhood. You present yourself to the world as a victim, starting to take offense. By being offended, you break the unspoken rule of human interaction - no one owes anyone anything. By being offended, you begin to behave as if the person owes you something. That you have the right to judge him for his “unfulfilled” obligations to you. You begin to blame, and now from the role of a rescuer, which you cover up for your reluctance to admit your emotional incompetence. The saddest thing is that plunging into .