Today we will look at how neurosis develops. Let's start from birth. At birth, the child already has certain characteristics that in the future may contribute to the development of neurosis. If you have observed young children, especially if they are siblings, you may have noticed that they already have some kind of character from birth. Some children are more lively and aggressive, some are more passive. Some are calm, while others, on the contrary, are very sensitive and vulnerable. Some people want to make contact as much as possible, while others stay apart. At birth, everyone has some kind of base, which can either be activated when interacting with the environment, or will never manifest itself. Well, then there are environmental factors, and for the most part they determine whether a person will develop neurosis or not. A child learns from his parents how to perceive the world. This can be well illustrated by the example of attitudes towards death. In Russia this is a tragic event, accompanied by a sea of ​​tears. In Bali it is a joyful festival where everyone dances and has fun. Our environment during childhood shapes how we will view the world. If we combine the first and second factors, we may notice that children of anxious parents are often anxious too. Both genetics and the transmission of a view of the world from mom and dad play here. In addition to how a person learns to look at the world, he also develops super-significant needs. This can be clearly seen in the example of children from an orphanage. For such a child, the need of the family will be extremely significant. Another example of such needs can be seen when a person’s father left the family. If this is a woman, then most likely it will be extremely valuable for her to save the marriage and keep her husband next to her, and if this is a man, then, accordingly, he will have an extremely valuable need to be a good husband. If parents gave love conditionally, then proof of its value will be important for a person. It will be extremely important to prove your intelligence, superiority, prestige, wealth, etc. Such a person will be hardworking and strive for achievement. But how are overvalued needs related to neurosis? Everything is very simple! Neurosis begins when overly significant needs cannot be satisfied, and a person has no way to absorb frustration. Let's take an achiever. He has a super-significant need for love and to be significant. The way to satisfy it is careerism, endless achievements, development. As long as he can prove through his work that he can be loved and respected, everything will be fine. But if there is a failure in this design, then neurosis will begin. The failure may occur in something that he will not be able to prove. For example, at work it is not possible to achieve something, it is not possible to develop a business, they are not given a promotion, etc. The second option for failure is when he succeeds, but at the same time he is still not given love and respect. At work, he may be ridiculed, condemned, treated with disdain, and then the person explodes. Either it doesn’t work out in his personal life and he is rejected. You can’t keep your partner close to you with the help of status, money, or position. The mere fact of not satisfying a need is not enough. Next comes the method of depreciation. And here we return to what our parents taught us - perception. If a person is able to absorb his failures, he will certainly be unpleasant, but he will cope with the situation and will not fall into neurosis. So what is wrong with an achiever? He may perceive his failure as a tragedy that completely characterizes him. “I’m a failure, I’ll never succeed again.” In the second option, a person may think “I will prove to them that I can be loved” and then he will try to please and not get any results. Over time, his nervous system will become exhausted, and he will fall into asthenia. How could he absorb this? Doesn't take failure so seriously. It didn’t work out, I can try again, differently in the first version. And in the second, try to establish communication in the team and, if that doesn’t work,.