What can’t you forgive? Let's start with the most dramatic change - for murder, as a violent end to life. Further easier changes will follow: forcible mutilation of the body, forcible confinement (as imprisonment), insult to personality (various options). Material from Wikipedia - the free encyclopedia: Forgiveness - remission of guilt, release from well-deserved punishment and renunciation of personal resentment, ill feelings towards the guilty , as well as refusal of revenge or demands for retribution and compensation for losses and suffering suffered. Also - forgiveness of debt or obligations (forgiveness of a monetary debt, a broken promise to do something, and so on). That is. if I don’t forgive for something, I have unkind feelings within me, a need for revenge, a need for compensation. Those. I carry it inside me, I feel and think about it. Did someone ask me about this? Or is it most beneficial for me? It’s hard for me to spend so much time and energy on preserving emotions and thoughts from some unpleasant situation within myself. So why do I need this? I believe that there is no point in getting into contact with this person again; it is better to move away to a safe distance so as not to repeat such relationships. But this is not the same as not forgiving. You can forgive and move away. I don’t carry anything inside me, I don’t waste time or energy... and I don’t make contact. You can receive compensation, forgive and move away. That's about how convenient it is for me. If I choose not to forgive, I need it for some reason. If you are offended by someone or want revenge... why do you need this? Although you have the right to do so. Forgiveness or not is a personal choice. This is a personal desire or lack thereof. This is normal. I suggest that the desire to receive compensation should not be combined with forgiveness as a renunciation of a personal grievance. Something was stolen from me (a pen from the table). Do I know who? Not for revenge, but for compensation. I find him and take his pen from the table. At the same time, it is not at all necessary to have bad feelings in yourself. Yes, this is unpleasant and perhaps this is enough inside me or to continue to scroll through this situation inside me??? What does this give energy? Which one? To increase revenge? Or for joy, warmth of the soul...? Therefore, I divide forgiveness into two parts: I want to receive compensation (to the extent possible), but I do not want to carry a personal grudge. Is it possible. I respect myself and others. I feel an unauthorized crossing of my personal boundaries. But this is my weakness and my oversight. So is his aggression. Two-way road. This means that at this point I need to strengthen my personal boundaries (to the extent possible). What can’t you forgive? - but for what you don’t want. If you don’t want it, don’t forgive me, if you want it, forgive me.