Perhaps, every person who finds himself in a crisis situation asks himself one of these questions at least once. I was no exception) The easiest way would be to answer with a quote from my favorite movie “Forrest Gump” - SHIT HAPPENS! But this answer is unlikely to satisfy anyone, especially in the early post-crisis period. And then the psyche begins to look for an answer, the one that will calm the soul and heart. In general, the work of grief consists of three main points: - Accept the fact of what happened; - Find for yourself an acceptable reason for what happened or finally come to the conclusion that there is none; And of course, learn to live in new realities. I was also looking for an answer for myself. A myriad of options were found, from isoteric to biological. The closest was the one that combines three reasons at the same time: • A sudden event, colored by strong emotions (loss of a loved one or something very valuable (money, property, status, health, etc.)) • A special mentality that guarantees “getting stuck” in a negative event. Obsessing over it. The icing on the cake...• The presence of a “weak” place in the body. As the saying goes: “Where it’s weak is where it breaks.” This could be a genetic mutation or, as we like to call it, heredity, a long-term inflammatory process, as well as a caught but not neutralized bacterium (Example: Helicobacter pylori) or a virus (Example: Human Papilloma Virus (HPV)). We cannot influence the presence or absence of sudden events in our lives, unless of course we ourselves became their organizer, but here, probably, the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation comes into force. We cannot influence heredity, although knowledge of the presence of some kind of predisposition obliges us to more carefully monitor changes in organism. In cases of breast cancer (breast cancer) in the presence of BRCA1,2 mutations, a prophylactic mastectomy (removal of the mammary gland) is performed. Many bacteria that enter the body can be treated, and against viruses, at least HPV, you can get vaccinated. What we can definitely influence is our psyche! But of course, there are some nuances here too. First, you need to answer yourself a few questions: - Am I satisfied with my life? - Am I in a harmonious, satisfying relationship? Or if there is none, do I feel good without a relationship? - My actions are mainly dictated by desire or a sense of duty, guilt , shame (underline correctly)? - Do I wake up in a good mood? - Does taking care of my children (if any) give me joy/pleasure? These are not all possible questions, but the answer to them may already make you think. Isn’t it time to change something?! And of course, the most important thing is YOUR DESIRE! Only if you have it can you guarantee positive changes in life!