From the author: "City Herald" Zheleznodorozhny"Don't patronize""Don't patronize me, don't follow me, don't bind my every step, don't wrap me in swaddling clothes of supervision and distrust, don't remind me with a word about my cradle. I am an independent person. I do not want to be led by the hand. This is the goal of my life. I see it, I think about it, I want to reach this peak on my own. I rise, take my first steps; and the higher my foot steps, the wider the horizon opens up to me, the more people I see, the more I get to know them, the more people see me from the greatness and boundlessness of what is revealed to me. I need the support of a friend. I will reach my peak if I lean on the shoulders of a strong and wise person. But I am ashamed and afraid to say this. I want everyone to think that I will reach the top on my own.” V.A. Sukhomlinsky A child aged 11-15 years is thrown out of two worlds. He is no longer a child and not yet an adult. He still has a desire to return back, to receive care, support, guardianship, but adults tell him: “Do everything yourself.” On the other hand, he already wants to go into the adult world with all its rights, but they tell him: “Why are you getting out here, it’s too early for you to manage money, you’re still small.” This age is the age of personal risk, speaking from a psychological point of view. Because there is a lot of new experience and absolutely no skills, since modern adults, passionate about self-development and self-realization, making money, pay little or no attention to the socialization of growing children. How does this usually happen? Children, with the help of their parents, seem to be delayed in the infantile phase. And not with those games that are related to real social issues at the moment, but with abstract games. What children play now has nothing to do with what problems adults solve in society. Let's remember how it was long before the advent of the subway and cars. A child is born into a peasant family. Until 4-5 years old, he is next to his mother. At the age of 5-6, boys go with their fathers to fish, hunt, chop wood, care for livestock, and play, imitating the activities of adults. The girls still stay with their mothers, but they are already learning handicrafts, cooking, and playing at raising children. Thus, by adolescence they had fully mastered all the skills of interaction in society, work, self-realization, etc. What is happening now? Everywhere one hears: “Oh, you don’t know what to do? Oh, you irresponsible bigot! Come on, go ahead!” Where to go next? At the beginning, they are protected from decisions, even the simplest ones, for a very long time. Answer the question: who chooses what sweater with trousers or dress your growing child will wear, you or the one for whom you bought it? Of course, it’s faster and easier to wear what you like, but believe me, when asking what your daughter or son wants, in 10-12 years you won’t need to ask with bulging eyes, “What’s next? To the army or to a university? Which institute?” ?". You will deprive yourself of the fate of living your child’s life for him. Why do you need this if you have your own, very interesting and happy life. The life of a child and the life of an adult are very different. The situation of a teenager is a situation of risk, which is why troubles so often happen to them, including physical things: suicide, harm to health. A situation of severe vulnerability, insecurity, disorientation - the situation of a teenager. There is a lot of internal energy, since a rapid and purely physiological maturation is taking place, incomprehensible to them, and instead of sitting in a quiet corner and being afraid, they run into trouble. For some, this age goes through a closure, but mostly these are still violent reactions. During this period, almost all teenagers are hypersexual. They are simply mastering a new male and female role. Naturally, they want to stand out and attract attention. So sexy. ___________________________________________________________