(A story from the practice of Marat Latypov. Names and ages have been deliberately changed.) She was brought to the reception by her relatives. Daria, 24 years old, two attempts at actual suicide, the last one taking twenty phenazepam tablets and four days of intensive care. From the very beginning, I did not want, and could not, take on this client: suicide is the sphere of psychiatry. As soon as I talked with her attending psychiatrist and made sure that she would be supported with medication, I got to work. After talking with her for some time, it became clear: there were no visible reasons for her death. The reasons are buried very deeply. - Marat, why are you tormenting me? - Dasha asked desperately during the first appointment - I’ll still “leave”... - meaning from life - Tell me, what is the meaning of this life? – Dasha unsettled me with her question. “The meaning of life is in the process of life itself,” I answered, a little confused. Daria thought about it, but didn’t say anything. We continued. Towards the end of the first appointment, I came to the next question: - Dasha, do you want to kill yourself... And what kind of yourself do you want to kill? – I included work with subpersonalities (the purpose of the work is to disconnect it from that part of the personality that she was going to kill). The client described in vivid colors the depressed, abnormal, gloomy part of herself. The separation occurred. Small victory! We tried to improvise with the dark part in different ways: we transformed it, tried to understand its meaning, etc. There was a feeling, a paradox, that the destructive part was alive, but at the same time dead! Dasha did not accept this part of herself, she wanted to kill her...! - Then just kill her! - I said. At the next reception, Dasha brought me a picture she had drawn herself, she is a creative person, calling it “Mexican Funeral”. Fascinating bright colors and colors, but it was a little creepy. She “buried” the dark part... she buried it, but left herself behind! - How do you feel now? - I asked. “There are no suicidal thoughts, but there are no desires or needs either... There is some kind of emptiness... I don’t want anything... Perhaps there are deeper desires hidden from me... She and I began to pull these desires to the surface, we worked in time until the moment when thoughts and attempts at suicide began. For some reason, there were only depraved desires: it turned out that she once wanted to try sex with a girl, then with two men... I brought to light any of her desires, clung to them, tried to instill a taste for them. Anything, as long as she lives! “Appetite comes with eating... If you want to try it, try it in reality!” – I suggested. A week later she came to me with the results of the “tests”. Dasha, the girl is very pretty, she slept with a girl, and also had sex with a guy (she hadn’t had sex before for almost a year). “Well, at least some signs of life,” I thought, “a depraved life, of course, but Life.” - Well, how do you like...? – he asked about the results. “Well, yes...” she answered. “There was something pleasant...” “Something pleasant is already good!” The main thing is that she began to take real steps and cling to life. At the same time, I understood that I was only treating a “cold,” while a more serious illness was still hidden. Having chosen the necessary methods of working with the client (hypnosis, age regression), I continued to work through the problem at a deeper level. Having plunged her into a trance, I asked her to go into her past, to the place of the root cause. She saw the picture: “I’m eight years old.” I'm returning home from school. We have a private house, I approach, my father is lying on the porch in a pool of blood... (the father is an entrepreneur, some bandits beat him, he survived). “He’s dead,” I thought. Shock. Horror. A pool of blood. There were no tears, only a terrible numbness... - Cry, scream!!! – I “threw” to little Dasha with pain and a cry. She screamed and then cried. Little Dasha gradually began to calm down - mom is nearby, dad is alive... - Please see how they wash away the blood stain from the porch... and how this stain is washed away from your soul... So that not a drop of that horror remains... See how your father recovered... The root cause is “puddle”blood,” the symbol of that tragedy, was finally eliminated... We worked with her on several more techniques regarding social adaptation, but it was just a technique. A year later, Dasha created her own website to support and help teenagers who want to commit suicide. She helped many people stay alive. Methods and techniques used in working with Dasha: “Suicide, suicide (from Latin sui caedere - to kill oneself) is the deliberate taking of one’s life, usually independent and voluntary.” Wikipedia. The purpose of suicide is to resolve a problem that brings great suffering. It is achieved through the cessation of consciousness. Reasons for suicide: - Visible: grief, depression, alcoholism, drugs, madness, heritage, imitation, personal complexes, etc.; - Invisible: unbearable mental pain from which a person wants to escape. Mental pain itself has a trigger (“trigger”) - a root cause. A person with visible problems is able to somehow cope. If mental pain is also added to one’s own complexes as a stimulus, then the “attack” is carried out from both sides simultaneously. For example, “nobody loves me” is an obvious reason, but at the same time there are some hobbies, interests and hobbies. But the meaninglessness of life in general has incomprehensible, invisible reasons. Of course, you can commit suicide “out of stupidity,” but there are fewer such cases than those where there are problems of the meaning of existence. A few words about “demonstrative suicide”: if you look closely at the person, it becomes more or less clear whether he really wants to die or his behavior is a kind of “blackmail”. I remembered one client who constantly talked about wanting to commit suicide, while her “freshly done” nails had a bright, life-affirming look. A new hairstyle, neat clothes, an open posture, a loud voice, a message to relatives about your strange desire - all these are signs of a “demonstration”. In the case of Dasha, things were much more serious. I began work with visible reasons - “The client described in vivid colors the depressed, abnormal, gloomy part of herself.” I will not describe in detail the qualities of this “dark part” - they live and cope with such a state. “Dasha, you want to kill yourself... And what kind of yourself do you want to kill?” The purpose of this question is to separate the problem part (P.P.) from Dasha herself. Having tried different options for transforming (healing) the problem part and actually receiving a negative result, I suggested that Dasha “kill her.” Dasha wanted to commit suicide. “Killing the problem part” is a kind of substitution and “realization” of such a desire. She did it beautifully – a “Mexican funeral.” The next step was to “dig” into her hidden desires. Having “pulled” them to the surface, Dasha began to realize them in reality, and in fact, to independently “cling” to Life. Even if there is no interest, actions give rise to dynamic processes in the body and psyche. For example, if you are in a bad mood right now, just straighten your shoulders, raise your head, smile and maintain this state for about three minutes. Watch your mood change. Or vice versa, if you are now in a good mood, then “drop” your body - head down, shoulders down, breathing intermittently. Does your mood change? Dasha, albeit without much desire, did something in her life, and accordingly, her mood and state changed. An invisible reason remained. The presence of an invisible reason was prompted by her question: “Tell me, what is the meaning of life?” I assumed that this existential question had something to do with her heartache. It was necessary to look for the root cause. So, we “reconsidered” adulthood when we were looking for “clues,” but now we had to “plunge” deeper into childhood itself. Two key problems emerge from the “picture” of the beaten father. The first is the restrained cry of little Dasha. Numbness “blocked” the fear and horror inside. This unconscious fear remained with her until adulthood, which unconsciously caused mental pain. “Cry, scream!!! – with pain and a cry of “threw” I little.