Psychologists refrain from giving advice. Advice is always one-sided - it may be suitable for one situation and turn out to be completely useless in another. But this goes well with popular psychology books - how? Due to recommendations, following which or not is everyone’s personal choice. Still, “each of us sometimes needs someone to talk to.” Under this heading, I published conversations with a psychologist in the newspaper of the Faculty of Philosophy and Sociology of Perm State National Research University “Subjective” for students, and I continue to do so here. Please note that these questions were asked by students and I answer them first of all, but I think everyone can find something in this for themselves.” “I couldn’t pass the exam on time; I had a couple of subjects left. I understand that time is passing and I need to prepare for a retake, but it is very difficult to learn the material - after a few minutes of preparation I begin to think that I will definitely not learn and pass.” Finding yourself faced with a retake, even if it was expected (poorly prepared, strict or disorganized teacher), when studying is important to you, is at least unpleasant, and sometimes causes panic. It is especially difficult to survive failure when those around you (for example, parents) did not expect this from you and demand excellent study. Firstly, it is worth talking honestly with yourself - how do I feel about the fact that I did not pass the subject the first time? And if your answer is upset, offended and angry, then you need to allow yourself to be properly angry. If you don’t allow yourself to be well angry at the situation, at the subject, at the teacher, then the anger ricochets back into you: “If everything is normal with the world around me, then that means it’s not normal with me” - with such an attitude, it will indeed be difficult for you to be distracted and continue to study. So, force yourself to scold well, to shout at this world, this university, this subject. Secondly, think about what is behind this failure for you? Is she the first or have there been many like this before? Was there someone who told you that nothing would work out for you and at what point did you start to believe it - remember the moment when you first discovered this thought in yourself? And also clearly pay attention to the result - what’s the worst that could happen if I don’t pass again now? It is clear that you would like to control the unpredictable future and know for sure that the actions you need to take now will lead to the desired result, but we are not magicians - what we can do is try to understand our fears, talk to them, find out what is behind this. And thirdly, let go of controlling the result - try to concentrate on what is in your hands. For example, create a comfortable space for yourself to study the material: - arrange a workplace; - set aside a special time during the day when you feel comfortable studying; - find a convenient form (write the material by hand, read aloud, read the topic and repeat without peeking, tell someone the ticket (even a cat)). A great trick is to limit your time - for example, do 25 minutes or just start with 5 minutes (today 5, tomorrow 10, the day after tomorrow 15); If you feel that you want to continue, practice until the moment when discomfort comes. Or categorize the topics by interest, ease (medium first, then hard, then easy). Be honest with yourself - it's better to do very little than nothing - and be kind to yourself. Good luck! Sincerely, Polina Merkusheva clinical psychologist (psychoanalytic approach) +79523388942, [email protected] If you liked the material, please click “Say thanks”»!