I will describe a strategy for how to defend yourself in a non-violent manner when pressure is placed on you and boundaries are crossed. 1. The softest level: - Convey a specific fact that you did not like in the behavior of your interlocutor. For example, “I don’t like it when you come into my room without asking or knocking.” - Say how you feel. For example, “I feel irritated and resentful in this situation.” - Explain what need of yours is violated. “The moment you enter a room without my permission, my need for privacy/solitude is violated.” - And in the end, ask not to do this again and in return offer an option of action that suits you. “Please don’t do this again. Please knock whenever you want to come in to me!” If the interlocutor is stubborn and tries to somehow persuade you not to set a limit. Or tries to manipulate (If you don’t do as I want, then I…). 2. You can move on to the second level “Broken Record Method”. Repeat your condition of entering the room with a knock until the interlocutor gives up. 3. If they don’t hear you or begin to show aggression, then simply leave the conversation. You did your best above 👆🏻. 4. This level of self-advocacy is used when you are openly threatened (For example, they threaten to fire you if you do not give up your position in favor of another, etc.). You can resort to an assertive (non-violent) threat in response. - As in level 1, say facts that do not suit you. - Tell me why they don’t suit you. - “If you continue to behave like this, then I will contact the police.” - If this does not work, carry out the threat. In order for you to be able to defend yourself, it is not enough to speak according to the scheme that I described. It is important to feel confident within yourself in what you say, to be firm in your statements, so that it is clear that everything is serious. It is important to know yourself and be honest with yourself. Don't apologize for asking for boundaries. Be direct and concise, don't waste too much time. When you feel a lot of guilt and fear, you need to learn to manage your emotions. Was it useful?) Like ❤️ and share with your loved ones 👭👫👬 If you feel exhausted, ashamed, afraid of defending your boundaries, you can sign up for a consultation. Together we can experience these feelings and learn to stand up for ourselves. .