First child. Two lines on the test, a delay - for some they are so long-awaited, but for others it’s out of the blue. And at first there is only a lot of emotions - happiness, joy, delight! And sometimes there is a grave doubt whether to continue the pregnancy, how to continue living. But the decision has been made - we will give birth, I will be a mother! And then the doctors, tests, the baby began to move, the first booties, diapers, vests... and a lot of thoughts, worries, questions. Girls and women who become mothers for the first time often ask themselves this difficult, troubling question: “What if I’m a bad mother?” What fears are hidden under this question, what exactly worries young mothers? What if I can’t love my child? What if I can’t understand what he needs. Why is he crying? And if I can’t give him enough tenderness and care, if I don’t want to be affectionate with him? Will I be able to protect him? Will I want him to become the center of my universe, will I have so much space in my heart and so much strength to withstand everything? I would like to start answering these questions from a physiological point of view. Nature came up with everything and thought it through for us. The cat does not wonder whether she loves her kitten, the she-wolf is not worried about whether she is a good mother... Animals instinctively take care of their cubs - they feed, protect, care for exactly as much as the period of growing up of the offspring requires. For people, of course, everything is more complicated. We are still social animals, inclined to question everything and trust the intellect, but no one has canceled nature. In the first stages after the birth of a baby, the appearance of love is associated with the release of certain hormones. The main ones are oxytocin and prolactin. The influence of prolactin on the emotional state during breastfeeding is based on its property of increasing the secretion of endorphins. It is believed that this provides physiological support for the development of mother-child attachment. Oxytocin is a hormone that ensures the contraction of breast cells and the secretion of milk, in addition, its release into the blood promotes contraction of the uterus in the postpartum period, which significantly reduces the risk of uterine bleeding. Experiments with animals have shown that injecting oxytocin directly into the brain outside of a feeding episode causes an increase in maternal behavior. This is why oxytocin is considered the “attachment hormone.” (Filippova G. G. “Psychology of motherhood”). All this confirms the importance of breastfeeding in the postpartum period, but the attachment of mothers with bottle-fed babies is formed in a similar way, driven by hormonal changes. All of the above is the first stage in the formation of attachment between mother and baby, very important, but not the only one. Love grows daily in the process of close contact between mother and baby, including physical contact - skin to skin, face to face during feeding, rocking, bathing. As a rule, most mothers adore their babies, they want to hug them, kiss them, smack them, cuddle them and almost even eat them - so great is the love and affection! And this is also partly a consequence of hormonal changes in the mother’s body - this is healthy, and this is normal. But there is no need to be scared if immediately after giving birth you did not feel something similar to this for your child! Everything has its time! Childbirth is a difficult test, give yourself time to recover, rethink your new role, and accept. Just be with your baby, listen to your feelings, and love will certainly come! It’s good if there is someone close who is ready to help you, and you can focus on the main thing - establishing contact with the child. So where does this anxiety about whether I will become a bad mother come from? One of the main reasons is the lack of continuity of generations. It used to be like this: they lived in large families, the older daughters were nannies for the younger children, and then they gave birth themselves, and then the younger ones took care of their nephews. It turns out that from childhood girls knew how to babysit, how!)