I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

reCAPTCHA v4
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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

reCAPTCHA v4
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Author's Note: Be careful. Without fanaticism) “Please!”, “Only you can do it right”, “Help, eh...”, “Do a good deed”, “Not for service, but for friendship” - these magic words can be confusing anyone. It can be very difficult to refuse. After all, we must understand, we must help, because we are still people... The reality, unfortunately, is simple and unsightly. Each person acts for his own benefit. And all the phrases from the first paragraph are complete manipulations. I’m not like that! - you say. I do not act for selfish reasons. But admit to yourself - aren’t you driven by vanity or maybe you expect that they will also help you in a difficult situation? Maybe they will help, maybe not. Or maybe you are doing everything to avoid minding your own business? Your work, your personal life? Maybe this is how you distract yourself from the shitty reality in which everything is disgusting and disgusting? Maybe yes, maybe not. Be that as it may, let's move on to practice. So, there’s another one begging for help on the horizon. Your task is not to lose composure and sobriety. If I do what he asks, what will I get in return? Recognition, admiration, praise? An increase in salary, promotion, the opportunity to take time off? Excuses for doing nothing for a while or going somewhere (or vice versa, doing something or leaving somewhere)? The feeling of my importance or that I am a GOOD person, well, etc. The next step is to weigh the pros and cons. If the game is worth the candle, agree. If you lose more than you gain, control yourself, the most important thing is ahead. How to say “no”. The face should be extremely serious, the gaze firm. “Excuse me, I just can’t do this right now. Honestly". Without waiting for the interlocutor’s reaction, we look away, or better yet, our head and the rest of our body, and dive into “our own business.” When the petitioner tries to resume the dialogue, we pretend that he has just appeared and with a surprised look we ask, “What, what?” If this doesn’t stop him, we continue to say no until he disappears. The main thing is to maintain a serious, calm expression on your face (busy look) and speak in an even voice, not loudly, but firmly. You will be surprised when, after completing all these procedures (if you do them correctly), you will see how your interlocutor has lost all interest in you and calmly, calmly went to look for the next victim. Of course, there may be indignation and accusations - in this case, your task is... in general, see the previous paragraph. And now a paragraph written in response to some comments: You can, of course, accuse me of cynicism and inhumanity. Or you can realize and accept all (any) motives for your behavior, no matter how society views them. Our culture teaches us (through parents, teachers and books) - vanity, greed, bragging, prudence, etc. this is very bad. Perhaps this is true. But this does not mean at all that we do not have the right to be like this. At least sometimes. Lying is bad, but who can say that they have never lied in their life? Some people actually manage to justify lies with good intentions, but I’m talking about something else. It was not for nothing that the words were spoken - “He who is without sin, let him throw the first stone!” The paradox is that when a person begins to realize the true motives of his actions and accept them as natural manifestations of his human essence, amazing changes begin to happen to him - he becomes calmer, lightness and confidence appear. In the end, a person will want to become “good” - to help everyone just like that, and not in order to get something in return. But this will be the result of free choice, and not something imposed by culture and society. We will do “bad” and “good” things and approach this soberly and confidently, and not with caution - “What will people say” or “What will my conscience say.” You can boldly and honestly say (at least to yourself) - “I did this because I wanted to do it” or “I made a mistake and will keep this in mind in the future,” etc. Good luck to you! Be yourself. This will make you ))

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