From the author: Words, how much they mean in our lives. Through words we reflect ourselves, our inner essence, our desires, dreams, ourselves. We manifest ourselves, are reflected in our own texts. It doesn’t matter what or who we’re talking about, what matters is what words we say, what we call it. And all these words are from our personal history, our experience. The essays are presented with the permission of Elena, 45 years old. She was in therapy in 2014-2015. The work used self-analysis based on films. Films for viewing were given taking into account the topics raised in the work, to understand the internal dynamics, emotional responses of repressed drives, unconscious needs. The main request is “post-divorce status.” Essay for the film “The Piano” How does love appear and grow? What does a woman need in love? What does a man need? How can one “grow” and change when love grows? Does a woman need so much from a man? Many questions arose in my mind while watching this film. The film touched me, of course, I liked it! And the main thread that runs through the plot for me from the beginning to the final frames is UNDERSTANDING... of another, empathy... of a close or distant person. Perhaps a stranger, through the prism of understanding aspirations, becomes a loved one, is drawn to him, drawn to him . Especially against the backdrop of general chaos, a foreign land... suddenly a man was found for Ada (George), who showed kindness and sympathy to her, even if at first he rudely showed power and violence... knowing her weakness... My indignation at Ada’s husband, Alistair, caused indignation from the first shots - “Bastard, he doesn’t have enough land... money-money-land-land....” And his obligations towards his wife? I understand my idealization! But the fact remains a fact - a rude, uncouth lout! He seems beautiful on the outside, but on the inside... But George, his soul is under a smaller layer of the intoxication of profit... He is touched by the enchanting sounds on the beach. After such a revelation of feelings, and Ada conveys himself, his world, feelings through music, he reaches out to her with all his heart, and not only that. This is passion. And his actions towards her are initially rude and uncouth like a man, he craves and he will receive! EE. This film shows the transformation of the heroes: Ada (in the final frames she learns to speak), and Alistair (when he lets her go with George), and George (when he stops, although his power over Ada is limitless: “I became a scoundrel, and you’re a whore!”).So, does a woman really need that much in love? Understanding, kindness, sympathy... And she is his! All the heroes went through their circles of Hell... through physical or mental pain... Ada stood on the brink of death... Alistair went through humiliation, rejection... George went through loss and separation and I believe that he is the one here a strong hero - he took the most important first step: he exchanged the piano for a piece of land... and the second - he stopped in violence... he abandoned Ada, so as not to lose himself and not bring the woman he loved to complete humiliation. This is my favorite hero: the actor simply fit in wonderfully this role! And, precisely, such heroes allow me to never lose faith in the best... in men... And to believe and know - there is a miracle and people create this miracle with their own hands, even through incredible mental suffering, pain, while remaining simply humane, compassionate, without stepping over the abyss when it’s too late...Essay for the film “Me, Me Again and My Mom” A wonderful film. Guillaume is amazing, sensitive, brave, inquisitive. I sympathized and empathized with him throughout the film. Is the film a comedy? Not for me. A sad film, but not a tragedy either, still such a life-affirming ending! How contagious optimism is - I just perked up, my energy rose and, despite it being very late in the evening, I did a bunch of things! “YES-YES!!!! So do them!” Although maybe sometimes it’s worth treating life with humor. Perhaps, but only after some time, for me, perhaps. And at the peak of the plot development... it’s hard. So here, having read that this film is autobiographical, experienced by the director - screenwriter - actor rolled into one... thenyes! Now, from the height of our years, we can talk about comedy. This is for me. The formation and maturation of a sensitive, delicate boy by nature is complicated by the attitude of his MOTHER towards him in the first place... And very distantly by the rest. The father here is more attractive to me, but, unfortunately, he stupidly opposes his mother like a man, and, unable to cope with her pressure on his son, he and his other sons reject Guillaume. The MOTHER is the main character here, who shapes an AMAZING child, and later a man. It is by going through all the trials that his mother presented to him that he becomes stronger, and perhaps stronger than his brothers, because they did not have to experience such a rich experience - feeling into what you love... A boy is a man - a son loves his mother, women, feminine essence... and how! How he understands! His love absorbs all gestures, movements, words, facial expressions... Such love. To get through the tangled jungle (of the mother’s relationship and through her, other people also relate to him...) to separate the masculine and feminine in oneself... This is a heroic hero. Strange heroism, but it takes a lot of strength. So as not to break. And it didn’t break! I’m so glad! But there are many broken, distorted destinies of such mothers: mothers - mumbles - gays - henpecked ... I don’t know what else to call ... I liked the hero’s aunt, who told him about her fate in a boarding school for girls ... she accepted him the way Guillaume’s mother oriented and relatives, but... more positively, without assertions - that this is SO and that’s all... I was outraged by almost all of her mother’s actions and words towards him, for example, her reaction to his frankness that he loved a fellow student... and even more outraged by her reaction and words about the fact that he loves a woman and that he is straight... A very relevant film for our time, when the powerful idea of ​​​​mixing the feminine and masculine, blurring the boundaries of the feminine - masculine, the idea of ​​European equality is weakening and destruction under the guise of this idea of ​​democracy. In childhood We need to more clearly and confidently provide education and shape the identity of children. This is a very, very, very important topic for me! Popular proverb “Say a hundred times to a person (and even more so to a child) a pig - he will grow up to be a pig” ... or anyone ..., but if he is not broken, then he will be stronger - more powerful, more humane a hundred times than other people who have not gone through this pressure! And an example of this is the film! Essay for the film “Dogville.” “If you want to know a person, give him power” Folk wisdom A tough film. Bold, naturalistic, frank to the point of absurdity... An allegory with symbols and images: bright, concentrated. How can one reveal the true face, his essence in a person? Here is one of the answer options in the film: give power to people. A sad story, not even dramatic (not for Dogviltsev, despite the reprisal against them..., for Grace). It is not easy to watch the film, especially the scenes of violence and bullying. It’s not easy to write about it, to come into contact once again with your feelings and thoughts. The film turns you inside out. Merciless. A masterpiece about cruelty and mercy. Kindness and malice. Openness and hypocrisy. I remembered shots from The Master and Margarita, when Jesus justified his tormentors, and Grace tries to justify to the last..., even Chuck at first. But she is not Jesus, then fear and hatred appeared in her. Until the last, she remained in illusions about Tom.. The first part of the film is about her illusions and the fulfilled dreams of a kind of “People's Will” who goes to the people, bowing to the fact that there are no strong and weak, there is equal work. She is growing herself out of an infantile girl. She is responsible for herself and is happy in this... She lives like they do with work! But she is a stranger. And also a beauty. Kind and hardworking. How not to love her. The second part gradually reveals the truth, when the power over her gradually grows, because she is helpless. It is amazing how the cruelty of cowards, confident in their impunity, is conveyed. Without pain it is impossible to look at the ashes of her ideas (especially the bright moment with the figures!). Thisthe horror begins from the moment when “it is much easier to convince yourself that the stakes are rising and you have to pay for shelter. First, by increasing the time of labor, then by reducing its payment, then by one’s own body, then by turning a person into a slave. The transformation of an equal person into a slaughtered animal is shown as reliably as the typical motivation for justifying this fact in the human mind. A woman brings complications and can bring trouble. She must pay for this with money, labor, sex, humiliation. And she pays for everything at full price. She loves this city. Because he sheltered her, she is able to forgive these people everything. EVERYTHING. And she forgives everything. She forgives when this city takes away her money, good name, reputation, self-esteem, femininity, turning her into a slave, both physically and morally. With her forgiveness, she allows the inhabitants of the city to turn her into an animal. She wants to not be what she could have become in her past life, cold, merciless and intolerant of people. She escaped from this past life of hers and, as it turned out, ended up in hell again.” Although she remained naive until the last frame, exterminating the Dogvilians... After what thoughts did she destroy them? She decided that they were dangerous for a possible stranger who would come after her! She saves a stranger... And does not take revenge for her torment. Holy naivety. I have great sympathy for her. But in general, in everyday terms, if you say about me... how this relates to my life... then this is not modest. But it's a fact. I can be wrong and think about myself better than I am... This is about me. I associated myself with Grace. After a recent unsuccessful marriage: this is about me. Yes, I consider myself like that - kind, sometimes naive, sincere. And beautiful. When I faced attacks of cruelty, anger, rage... what did I do? She went through the same stages as she: euphoria. How she justified her husband to the last. She endured and then simply existed nearby (like she did in the last days of her life in the village), but she had to immediately “throw” something at him and run away…. (destroying it is, of course, impossible). Although, perhaps, it is dangerous for the next “traveler”….My conclusion. You just need to be wiser. That's all. The heroine has become wiser... Essay for the film “Instinct” The plot of the film is quite banal for me. The idea of ​​​​protecting animals, it is necessary to talk about this, it is necessary to constantly talk about it, and why not cover this topic again? And the theme of developing friendships, camaraderie, student-teacher relationships, initially starting with a challenge from one to the other. The acting of both Tio and Ethan is important here. Convincing. And Hopkins's look is worth it! It penetrates through and through. The theme of freedom is relevant for me here. Fromm's “Flight from Freedom” is spot on here. What is a person running from in our society? What is Ethan running from? What is Tio running from? Iten’s words: “It’s an incomprehensible feeling when you are protected...” when he spoke about the gorilla who took him under protection. Man in his individuality is in anxiety, he is powerless. So he strives to fall under the conformal feeling of unity. With What or Whom? Or merge with society, with the ideas that float in it, be included in it... Or under the influence of natural forces? Of course, being closer to nature is more natural, animals are innocent... Merging with them is natural... but with the cruel society...to be one and at the same time with a sadist in prison? This is different. But the cruelty is also different. The killing of gorilla catchers is cruel, but is there any justification? Protection from violence? Yes, this is our society. The idea of ​​non-resistance to evil through violence is not for me. It’s captivating. When Tio’s transformation takes place in the process of communicating with Iten, it, as always, gives me warm feelings, but how could it be otherwise? After all, the best qualities of a person are revealed, there is an awareness of the meaning of life... “What are the knots that bind me? This is not a job. This is a game... I did not insult anyone, and I did not love anyone. It's a game. You taught me to live outside the game. You taught me how to live! It scares me nowreturning to the game? ...". Such a completion. Even if he returns, his transformation has already passed, and the game will definitely not completely absorb him! I think so. He will no longer fall into illusions. Our whole life is an illusion to one degree or another. Although...Yes, the primatologist himself also came out of his aggression towards everything and everyone. He opened up to his daughter, and it just touches the soul. The relief and completion of the relationship is wonderful! “Freedom is not a dream... Thank you for letting me enjoy it and returning my daughter.” And the scene in the rain. Amazing. COMPLETE and total acceptance and unity with nature. This is freedom. Freedom without freedom. A person is always united despite his uniqueness. The eternal question... unity with what or who, or how? Essay for the film “In the Mood for Love” Good title... In the Mood for Love. What is the mood of the characters? After they find out that their spouses are having an affair? Anything at first, but not love: sacrificial, hopeless, unexpressed, monotonous - this is external. And internally with pain, loss and resentment. The pace of the film and measured, repetitive shots for me speak of the loneliness of Su and Chow. And the rain is like tears. And the dark narrow street and small apartments, office premises and constraining dresses Su. The film initially hides the emotions of the characters. They are too frozen, too graceful and unnatural. For me, emotions are in the first frames, in the music chosen by the director, in measured, calmly flowing plots... This is on the surface. In the depths is the grief that finally breaks through in one of the plots: in Su’s tears when she leans on Chow’s shoulder. The changing moods and their layers are what’s interesting: in addition to the background mood of loss and sadness of the characters, there is a friendly, interested and creative mood layered in their conversations. Caring. And in their discussion of the plot of the book. The paths of the heroes cross, and they have something to say to each other, but for some reason I am left with a feeling of emptiness and failure in Su’s choice. Yes, even if she doesn’t want to be like her husband, but still, why is she emotionally “dead” to me? Or did the tone of her mood towards life remain too weak, monotonous, bored and empty for me? Chow is closer to me. He woke up and came out of the extinct relationship with his wife “revived”, he is ready to love. What would I do if I were Su? I hope I would enjoy Chow's affection. I hope I'm not like her. She smells of hopelessness at the loss of love... Is it really impossible to give yourself, your best feelings to a worthy man? And does she have the strength... the strength to give? Share the best, not just grief and misfortune. The sad ending is that there was no mutual happiness for the characters. The slow pace of the film gives time to me, as a viewer, to feel in my heart the miracle of a kind relationship, the miracle of Chow’s slow manifestation of love. I was perplexed and disappointed at the end of the film, that she did not dare to go towards something beautiful. This film touched my soul and heart, and this is worth a lot, because I so often perceive the world through thought and reasoning. And here you just want to immerse yourself in feelings, in slow breathing, even with a tinge of sadness. Essay for the film “The Bridges of Edison County” The film moved me to tears, turned me over and made me go through a storm of feelings and emotions. I think this is a film about a strong woman and her sacrifice for the sake of her children and husband Richard. The life of a lonely provincial woman, dissolved in close people and obeying the laws of a small district. At the time of her meetings with Robert, she had already exhausted herself, lost herself, realizing her unfulfilled desires and possibilities. An unexpected meeting of lonely people, which changed her perception, changed her. Outwardly this did not express itself in any way, except perhaps in friendship with a rejected woman, but internally it gave her strength for the rest of her life. At first I went through a feeling of distrust of a stranger, childish interest and timidity at their first steps towards each other... And when their sincere mutual feeling manifested itself, a sharp feeling arose.»