From the author: The article contains a drawing and a situation from the January Art Practice. Names and details are missing, publication has been agreed upon. The drawing is considered partially, in general and as a whole. The article contains an episode of work and recommendations in the format “What to do with it.” The article is about a drawing from my Art practice. Finally, I became whole. Quote It's amazing how one woman can combine great human strength and energy with complete helplessness! And why? Yes, because the mother is omnipotent and omnipotent for each of us. At any age, we are under the power of mother’s programs and words. It is useless to resist helplessness until it is realized and accepted. Drawing on the topic “What I want” The drawing is extremely paradoxical, it essentially contains three plots. I ask the author to tell me what this all means. A woman, let’s call her V., talks in a cheerful voice about the problems of her life. The story is told in such a harmonious, structured way, with paragraphs, punctuation, pauses, hyphens and dashes. By the way, don’t get confused about where the hyphen is, where the dash is, and where the new thought is and you need to start from the next line. I will note that in her voice and intonation there is absolutely no any slightest complaint, resentment or regret, although her story is not at all funny, to put it mildly, and she describes serious and deep problems, especially with regard to the illnesses of her children (without details here). I slowly begin to slide out of the chair, and think about the topic: how can I help this lady, who has already stopped her galloping horse, sent her to graze on the green grass, and has already put out the burning hut. She seated the children on benches, wiped everyone’s noses, fed them, gave them something to drink, and put them to bed. I look at the drawing and see that her subconscious actually sees the goal and knows what it wants, on the right side of the drawing is the area of ​​the future - everything is in best depicted. I won’t comment on the colors of the figures and the sun now. I begin to ask clarifying questions... - We lived with my husband for twenty years and separated. Why? Because he couldn’t withstand my energy and pressure. He had nothing left to do, I did everything. We return to the drawing and look at the central figure. Somehow she doesn’t particularly look like an energetic and strong person, which also doesn’t fit with her appearance, behavior and speech. I start asking clarifying questions again....-Here is your central figure, is that you? That means you. The image is in a blue dress, and you can’t see your hands.. Please tell us about your mother, if possible. (Here I will not clarify why I had a connection between the color blue and my mother, but there is this connection. In addition, the mother in the picture is depicted in gold, on the left side of the picture.) Yes, I had difficulties with my mother and sister relationships (narrates several episodes). And most importantly, my mother told me at the age of 12 that I had to prove to everyone - her and my sister - that I was independent and an adult, and that I had to do everything myself. What do these words mean for the subconscious? Here's what: If you do it yourself, we will love you. Otherwise, you are bad. As a result, I ask V.: What can you do with the drawing right now? She immediately replies that the first thing to do is to redraw herself, the central figure. I propose to do this.... And then... oops... V.’s voice changes, her eyes become pitifully dog-like, and she takes me away from the topic with indirect questions about the fact that she does not believe in the happiness of the right side of the picture, because knows how to achieve this.What actually happened?B. for many years she proved to others that she was independent and strong, she lived with her husband for twenty years, but subconsciously lived her life with her mother, and deserved love. As soon as she had the opportunity to change the situation, psychological defenses were activated, and secondary benefits began to work. In the role of a strong and active woman, in a burning hut and with a galloping horse, V. feels her importance and great martyrdom, which compensates for her low self-esteem (I would say almost killed) by her mother. Why killed? Because V. reduces all the works and achievements to the format: Nothing like that.