One Persian story tells about a traveler who, with great difficulty, walked along a seemingly endless road. He was covered with all sorts of objects. A heavy bag of sand hung behind his back, a thick waterskin wrapped around his torso, and in his hands he carried a stone. In the scorching heat of the afternoon, he met a peasant. “Oh, weary traveler, why have you loaded yourself with these fragments of rocks?” - he asked. “It’s really stupid,” the traveler answered, “but I still haven’t noticed them.” Soon he met another peasant: “Tell me, tired traveler, why are you suffering with a rotten pumpkin on your head and dragging such heavy iron weights? — he asked. “I’m very glad that you brought this to my attention.” I didn't even know I was bothering myself with this. Throwing off his chains, he threw the pumpkin into a roadside ditch so that it fell apart. And again I felt relief. But the further he walked, the more he suffered. And so on, meeting after meeting, the traveler freed himself from the various shackles that bound him. Lost in thought, he stood and looked at the setting sun. The last rays of the sun sent him enlightenment: he suddenly saw a heavy millstone on his neck and realized that because of it he was walking hunched over. The traveler untied the millstone and threw it into the river as far as he could. Free from the burdens that burdened him, he continued his journey in the cool of the evening, hoping to find an inn. Brief summary of N. Pezeshkian’s parable “A parting story” Often, it is the burden of demands made to oneself or from people around him, creates emotional tension. Emotional tension, in turn, provokes muscle tension. It’s as if a person “must maintain his posture,” not relax, and be mobilized. A long-term state of hypertonicity of the back muscles leads to a decrease in spontaneity of movements and the inability to rest and relax. In turn, this overloads our spine, accelerates the aging process and the destruction of intervertebral discs. One of my clients described how her attitudes affected the sphere of the body as follows: “My parents always compared me with others, I always thought that about me they'll think about it. Both in childhood and in my student years, it always seemed to me that someone was looking at me, and I should look accordingly. Therefore, at the age of 5 or 6, I decided that I would always strive to look perfect. I studied how models walk on catwalks and always tried to walk that way in front of people. This is a very tense and constrained position; I have few spontaneous movements. And now, as soon as they look at me or I look at myself, I try to maintain my posture, think about how I look from the outside. I'm always on edge. I try to do everything right.” However, the girl noticed that during periods when she managed to relax for some time and lower the demands on herself, her back pain decreased. Most often, these were periods after some important events (for example, exams) and there was a “legal” permission to rest; or when she spent a long time with her family. Working with this client, we more than once came to the conclusion that inflated demands on ourselves, the desire for ideals, and perfectionism are characteristic not only in the sphere of the body and appearance. In the area of ​​work and achievement, there were high expectations from oneself in terms of school, work and financial success; in the sphere of contacts there was an idea of ​​oneself as very open, sociable and having many close social connections, etc. In this case, we gradually worked on expanding the concept of Self, namely, accepting and caring for oneself, regardless of success or quantity completed tasks. The girl did not lose her ambitions, but at the same time her sense of shame decreased; her self-respect and self-acceptance were less dependent on her diligence. In the We concept, thanks to the reduction of the feeling of shame, it was possible to reduce the importance of the opinions of others, which made it possible to expand openness in social contacts. Change in self-attitude.