Borders, borders, borders……. We live in a society and were raised with this concept or not, but we are obliged to comply with them. First of all, for yourself, Beloved. Otherwise, this leads to huge problems, which are later very difficult to cope with. So, everything that happens to us, as a rule, goes far from childhood. Let's figure it out. Many of us have encountered people of different personality types. Some people strive for something throughout their lives, set goals, overcome them, easily cope with failures, no matter what, boldly move forward, know how to communicate with people, ask for help and accept it with dignity. In a word, these people manage their own lives. Others, unlike the first, constantly experience a feeling of dissatisfaction, expectation of some kind of help, understanding when the problem will be solved by itself, constant complaints, demands in relation to others. This is the category of those people who have not learned and do not want to manage their own lives. In the book “How to Raise a Child’s Sense of Responsibility,” G. Cloud describes and explains that such differences between people occur because the parents have formed the correct concept of boundaries in the child. Simple and a fairly acceptable way to set boundaries in education is to start with yourself. Naturally, in infancy and before the baby begins to explore the world by crawling, there will be no talk about establishing boundaries between mother and baby. As the child grows, the mother must clearly define to her child that he is not the center of the universe. This is a very touching and difficult question for both. For a child, restrictions in the attention of the one and only destined for him are more difficult than for a mother, who must return to her previous state, to her interests, communication, professional activities, which for her have already established boundaries, it is much easier to do this. Mom already with its established boundaries will not allow the child to bang his head on the floor, throw toys, hit her with his fists, call her names, etc. Our established boundaries give children a clear understanding that it is forbidden to make noise when parents are resting, interrupt people, throw things around, take without permission for other people's things, but at the same time you need to have an understanding that the child is also a person who has his own interests, time, communication. Everything, the rules and traditions that we build in the family are a special mirror for the child, in the future he will see himself in it. A case from practice: A long-awaited child in a second marriage for both parents, the father is rapidly providing for and entrusts the upbringing of the child entirely to a mother who, forgetting about everything in the world, immerses herself in the process. Mom happily immersed herself in “upbringing,” completely forgetting about herself, allowing the child to behave as he wanted. Everyday problems take over all family members, without noticing the growing child. Without warning his wife, the husband could linger for a long time, and she, in turn, without giving him the opportunity to speak out, started domestic squabbles, allowing him to shout and express himself. The child, in turn, perceives the parents’ behavior model as the norm. If you are angry, nothing will happen to you for it. If I can shout louder, others must endure. It all depends on what kind of person is nearby. What kind of personality do you think will grow up????????? I assure you that there is no point in proving to such a person that he needs to control his emotions in a conflict situation and behave adequately in relation to the boundaries of another person. In this case, everything turned out to be sad. I was approached by an adult who did not know how to communicate, so he was left completely alone without friends, family, or his favorite job. I couldn’t set a goal correctly in order to achieve it, I abandoned what I started in the middle, in the hope that everything would be solved by itself. I will not delve into this situation, why it turned out this way. As a rule, having mirrored the behavior model in his family, the child will!