Disputes and discussions are something that happens from time to time in everyone’s life. The topics that we encounter are usually different, but the feelings that accompany an argument are often the same. What are the feelings during an argument? can we notice and record in ourselves?⏺Irritation⏺Dissatisfaction⏺AngerWhen we cannot convince the enemy, when our interlocutor in a dispute clearly puts pressure on us with his arguments, considers them the only true ones (how is that possible?!).⏺Sadness⏺SadnessWhen we clearly devalued, silenced, it seems to us that the attitude towards ourselves is changing for the worse.⏺Apathy When they try to drag us into an argument, but even if the topic is interesting, we respond sluggishly, since we are already tired to death of losing and listening to stupid other people’s arguments. As if be that as it may, in an argument we are able to experience joy, satisfaction and a real buzz. Only it may seem to us that these emotions are much less common than others. So, we can be drawn into an argument, we can be drawn into this process. Of course, some of us may choose to ignore and refuse all disputes and discussions. But there are topics where you really want to speak out. Therefore, you can choose an argument and... slightly change your understanding of what is happening at this moment. Let's try to figure it out. Under what conditions, in short, does joy appear in the process and/or result of a discussion? A common answer: when I won, when I proved that it was I who was right, and not he, such an insidious dissident heretic. My answer: always, but when several conditions. Do you understand??? Always! No, you clearly haven’t all realized this wonderful fact yet. Do you want me to list the conditions? I won’t list them, guess for yourself. Conditions under which an argument will bring you positive emotions: 1) Argue only on an interesting topic. Why should you waste time on empty talk? Well, really! 2) Argue on a topic in which you know at least something (if you don’t know, at least read Wikipedia). You don’t want to be silent like a fish when you are bombarded with beautifully designed arguments? They love to do this! 3) Eliminate, completely (!), the mindset of winning. Arguing for the sake of winning an argument often ends sadly: you spent resources and ruined your mood. 4) Fall in love with the process of discussion, fall in love with it, with every word you utter. Savor every phrase, watch the reaction of your interlocutor, enjoy! This is about inclusion and awareness. They create the mood.5) Don't argue with boors. As soon as they start insulting you, stop. Come up with some kind of safe phrase that you will use as soon as you encounter ill-mannered individuals. My phrase, for example: “I stopped understanding some of the words that you began to pronounce, apparently from the height of my “Intellectually, this is not entirely possible, so I stop our conversation, which will lead nowhere.” ⬅ This phrase also contains an example of how to offend a person culturally, if you want to offend him. It happens that people greatly insult us, and here I am of the opinion that it is better not to keep emotions inside, but to express them in such beautiful and intelligent phrases. I have listed the main points. Of course, it is quite likely that there are still some nuances left, but they can already be thought through by inertia. Finally, I will answer the question: why is it worth enjoying the process in this case, and not the result? The result is often disappointing, but the process is always varied, ambiguous, full of everything, than possible. The result often limits, the process expands. Good luck in your disputes and debates. Be the happiest in the process of discussions!