This article will talk about headaches in women and sex life. Sex is a natural physiological need for many animal species on earth, and for humans it is also a physical manifestation of love, it is a way of communication and transfer of energies between lovers, it is not just sexual intercourse, but studying each other on a different level - on the physical, intimate, internal. You could even say that in sex we also work through the problems of our subconscious, because... all the dreams, desires and fantasies that are hidden in it, because sex, bypassing social status, masks and the many roles that a person plays in life, allows one to open up to the true, the present. If there are any problems in your sexual life, you should work with a psychologist or psychotherapist, because... even a partner is not always able to withstand “the whole naked truth” about a woman…. Of course, everyone knows the phrase “not today, honey, my head hurts...”, but there are so many anecdotes on this topic, jokes, demotivators that circulate on the Internet. The point of the joke is that a woman “invents” a headache for herself in order to avoid making love with her husband. But not all men know that she is “not making it up”, she really has a headache, for real, sometimes even leading to a migraine. Migraine is not a disease, but a regulatory and protective reaction formed at a certain period of life - most often during puberty, when regulation of the body is established, or a crisis period, requiring the development of new regulatory mechanisms - and used in the future as necessary. If the body, due to life circumstances or ingrained “habits,” requires a certain regulatory reaction, it will find opportunities to implement it. On the other hand, when the body is “all right”, then attacks will not develop, and after some, quite a long time of “non-use” of the reaction, it can leave the arsenal of use against the background of brain plasticity. In other words, if psychological problems are solved of a sexual nature, the symptom will not occur (of course, if there is no “secondary benefit” for the woman). Some time ago I was at a MK with fellow psychologist Ksenia Leshchinskaya, the master class was on the topic “Elements of psychotherapy for anorgasmia in women” and there she quite succinctly described the causes of sexual disorders in women. I will share them with you: Projection of a child’s attitude towards parents onto a partner Relationships between parents between themselves Relationships in the parental family to issues of gender Traumatization in childhood and adolescence Negative experiences in relationships with a partner, illusions about what he should be Incestuous fantasies Formation of attitudes towards one’s body Attitudes towards masturbation and consequences Psychotrauma at the beginning of sexual intercourse lifeLove disappointmentsDependence on a partnerViolenceHomosexual fantasies. To put it another way, the points listed above are the cause or “core” of the conflict, which, at the slightest reminder to a girl or woman of a trauma situation, can turn on her somatic defenses – headaches. I appeal to men: the next time your woman complains of headaches on the eve of sex, think about it: maybe she is not faking it, but is again experiencing pain, anger, disappointment, shame or resentment, which, of course, is not associated with you, but had place to be in her life before…. Finally, I want to say something to women as well. If you have noticed a strong connection between your migraines or headaches and your sex life, consider going to a psychologist and a course of psychotherapy, and there is nothing scary, shameful or humiliating about it. This will help you better understand and accept yourself and save you (perhaps forever) from headaches. Love and accept yourself and your body and be healthy!!!