Today I came up with a metaphor that the process of psychotherapy can be compared to cleaning. And the more unpleasant it (cleaning) is, the more cluttered the space is. And how differently people treat cleaning! Someone wants to walk on top and not look in the closets - they know that so much will fall out that it will take a month then rake. Someone, on the contrary, rolls up their sleeves and opens everything and everyone, dumps it all out in the middle of the inner apartment, and then gives up. And some don’t let anyone home at all and pretend that everything is in order. And then he looks at all this... and he wants to howl. And I want to hire a cleaning assistant... Or not - I want to hire someone who will thoroughly tidy it all up, wash it and put it in order, and I will enjoy the result. Moreover, it is advisable for me to go for a walk or sleep at this time. And even if this were possible, within the framework of psychotherapy (where can you get away with yourself), then the benefit from this will still be short-lived. Because if you: - haven’t figured out what things you need and what belongs in the landfill; - haven’t divided your belongings into categories, well, at least into useful and pleasant ones; - you haven’t assigned places to things and haven’t learned how to return them to those places; - you allow others and yourself to trample on the carpets with dirty shoes... The mess will soon reign again. But even if you are already a seasoned soul-searcher and have given yourself pluses on all points, this still does not mean that cleaning has disappeared from your life. It will become many times smaller and lighter, but will always be with us. And sometimes we will do it cheerfully and regularly. And sometimes we save up to the point of “that’s it, screw it, I can’t do this anymore.” Because it’s normal to sometimes not have the resources, not to want to deal with it now, not to be perfect. It's normal to be alive and inhabited, not a glossy magazine cover. I don't really like the process of cleaning, but I like to enjoy cleanliness. And, if you stick to this metaphor, I always have something to think about myself and also have something to talk about with my therapist. And you? :)