From the author: You can read all articles by Irina Pompa-Bulygina on V P O I S K A H H A P T Y Do not chase after happiness - it is always in you. (Pythagoras) We are all so different, unlike each other, unique in our own way and at the same time amazingly the same in one thing. We all want HAPPINESS. Every person, from the moment of birth until the last breath, strives for it... All his life he is in search of this mysterious, desired, such a necessary state of happiness for himself and, at the same time, so fickle and fleeting! And in rare moments, hours and days, we are ready to fly on wings, sing, spin, love everyone and give everyone smiles, create and sow goodness. And everything would be great if this state lasted all the time and forever... but it remains a mystery – why is it leaving us so quickly? Maybe we just get used to it, it becomes ordinary and we want something more? Perhaps we can't hold on to this feeling? Or do we not quite understand what truly IS HAPPINESS? What is Happiness? How many generations have asked this question! In what units is it measured? How can we learn to hold it, to make it so that it is not a rare gift of fate for a person, but becomes a natural state of our stay on Earth? What can be done so that Happiness is not a goal, but a way of life? Is this possible? It turns out yes. The only task is to understand: where is the source of happiness and the conditions for obtaining it. Therein lies the main question. I remember the joke. A man is walking down the street and sees a woman walking around a lantern and looking for something on the ground. “What are you looking for?” he asks. “Keys to the house.” “I’ve been looking for two hours now and can’t find it,” the woman answers. “Where did you lose them?” “At the entrance.” “Why are you looking here, by the lamppost?” “It’s brighter here... A person always wants to find the answer where it’s easier to get it.” . It's always easier to ask others. It's hard to cope with yourself. It is easier to blame others for your failures and problems. Yourself is very difficult. Seeing the shortcomings of others is easy. Your own - with difficulty. Therefore, you need to start with YOURSELF. To begin with. Take full responsibility for the events that happen to us. Because we attract a lot, one way or another: with our character, our mood, our thoughts... and we receive the appropriate reaction from others. Then. Understand and accept the fact that all evil is within ourselves. There is only good outside. It is not the weather that is bad, but my mood does not want to see anything good in it. It is not the person who is bad, but my attitude towards him. And it wasn’t someone who ruined my mood, but I depend too much on this person’s opinion or his emotions. And finally. As long as we believe that our happiness is somewhere OUTSIDE, and we depend on WHO or WHAT gives it to us, as long as we will be unhappy and deeply dependent on external circumstances. And there will always be someone or something who can be blamed for our misfortunes: we were not given enough, we were not underestimated, we were deprived. And the conclusion is that those around you are to blame. This is the most important misconception. I remember the phrase that was written by the hero of one well-known film: “Happiness is when you are understood...”. It turns out that when I am understood, loved, noticed, appreciated, respected, remembered - then I am happy. And when not - unhappy? But if we accept this formula as the basis of happiness - then, taking into account other existing formulas of our existence: all people are different, EVERYONE cannot understand me, love me, notice me, appreciate me, etc. - it turns out that it is impossible to be happy! Because there are a lot of people who don’t understand, don’t like, etc. me! Therefore, I am unhappy. The circle closes. “There is no happiness in life!” - how some tried to immortalize this formula on their own body)).Where does MY happiness come from so dependent on the mood, desire, thoughts of other people? Why do external circumstances affect me so much?.