I'm not a robot

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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

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First, let's define what perfectionism is? This is the desire to achieve the ideal in everything, to be the best in everything. Sometimes achieving this ideal occurs “at any cost,” contrary to common sense. This is a neurotic character trait, and in ordinary life it is expressed as: - the desire for ideal order; - extremely high demands on oneself and others; - the belief that everything in life should be done professionally. This applies to work, hobbies, and raising children; - the desire to collect and analyze as much information as possible before making a decision; - postponing things due to a lack of certain (ideal) conditions or time; - constant attempts to improve oneself and the results of your work to an ideal state; - fear of looking funny and ridiculous; - excessive sensitivity to criticism; - comparing yourself with more successful people. How to raise a perfectionist from an ordinary child? To do this, it is enough to constantly compare the child with other children, scold or beat him for bad grades, set tasks that are impossible for him, and raise the bar. Also, it is necessary to instill in the child that he will be loved on the condition that he “behaves well, studies well, obeys his mother,” etc. Therefore, parents who believe that the best method of raising a successful personality is to point out shortcomings and not paying attention to the merits of their child (well, so as not to over-praise), they have every chance of raising a neurotic perfectionist. What are the consequences? Such a child, becoming an adult, becomes dependent on the value judgments of other people both in relation to his personality and in relation to results his work. Being in a responsible (and sometimes simple) job, a perfectionist is constantly in a state of tension, stress (fear of not being able to do it or doing a bad job), by the age of 40-50, a perfectionist may well become seriously ill or even end up in a hospital bed. Thus, perfectionism is a powerful factor in the occurrence of depressive, anxiety, somatomorphic (pain) disorders, eating disorders, various types of addictions, and personality disorders. Treatment of these diseases places a heavy burden both on the perfectionist himself, and on his family and on the entire society as a whole. How to deal with this? 1. Realize the fact that: you can be loved simply for what you are! You can become a source of love for yourself.2. Keep it simple! You need to lower your expectations and demands on yourself, accept your imperfections, and simply allow yourself to be who you are.3. Thank and praise yourself for everything you do. In this situation, you did everything you could do, no more and no less.4. Determine your priorities: what is truly important to you in life? Why do I need it? What will this give me?5. Determine what result will be good enough for you (in any matter), stop there.6. Plan the main things, don't get hung up on the little things.7. Do work in parts, especially difficult or large ones.

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