We all love to play games; it's interesting, enjoyable, and sometimes even educational. It’s not for nothing that our life is compared to a game. However, not all games can be useful for humans. For his internal state, to be precise. Often people try to replace real intimacy with games, especially often in relationships between a man and a woman. After all, it happens that people do not create relationships, families, but only play at it. How in childhood children play daughters and mothers. But the only difference is that in such a game everything is for real, and not for fun, as in childhood. But the rules are the same, everyone must play their assigned role. Moreover, all interaction comes down to the fulfillment of such roles. And each role is a certain model of behavior and a person cannot behave differently, otherwise he breaks the rules of the entire game. Moreover, each role has both rights and responsibilities. So, a woman who wants to play the role of a little girl in a relationship should remember that a little girl is an obedient girl. She can be allowed or denied something, for her own benefit, according to her parents. Moreover, her opinion is not important at all. After all, a child is rarely asked for his consent to something. It’s the same with a man who decided to play the role of a little boy, there will be prohibitions, and it doesn’t matter what they relate to friends, fishing, or anything else. For those who are trying to play in a pair of elders (parents), it is important to understand that they need to work with the child, and also decide a lot for him (her) and take responsibility for any of his or her actions. After all, in reality, it is the parents who are responsible for their young children. When relationships are replaced by play, then, most likely, the cause of conflicts will most often be a childish rebellion, when the child does not want to obey, but, as a rule, such rebellions are suppressed, and, most often, with the help of force. That is, whoever is older (plays a role) is right. In such couples, it is not customary to agree; this replaces the permission or prohibition of one, or one, and the other, or the other must obey or obey. These are the rules of this family game. And there is also no mutual support, because in reality, the child cannot support the parent, and the parent often simply feels sorry for the child and does something for him. At the same time, the rules of this family game often prohibit people from changing roles. The choice to play family rather than build relationships is often explained by fear. After all, no one has experience in building their own relationship with another person, and it is often impossible to copy. And when there is such an experience, and it (the experience) is negative, it is even more scary. Of course, it’s scary to start something that you haven’t done before, there may be mistakes that will have to be corrected, there may be pain, but, by and large, this is the only way to learn the most important thing - to love. Your psychologist Anton Chernykh