"How to believe in himself after a divorce?" An Internet acquaintance asked me this question not too long ago... I somehow involuntarily remembered conversations with men I knew, have crossed their personal Rubicon. Of course, this is a morally difficult situation... Of course, this is the case when all participants suffer... Of course, it is often better to divorce than to “endure these outrages further”... But, damn it! How hard does divorce hit a man’s self-esteem! In essence, what does divorce mean for a man?! He took responsibility, but couldn’t handle it, couldn’t pull it off, gave it back... He let down those who relied on him, didn’t live up to the trust placed in him.. In the end, I let myself down! Here, a feeling of guilt, doubts about one’s own masculinity, loss of trust in the world, in women are fused together... In fact, the very fact of divorce destroys the usual foundations, literally cripples a person, forcing him to doubt everything he believed in and treasured... All this simply cannot but knock down self-confidence, or even completely destroy it! What to do here? How to revive your confidence after a Divorce? Before offering recommendations, I will make a reservation that a lot depends on the specific situation: on the reason for the divorce, on the age of the spouses, on the environment in which they lived; from the presence and age of children, from relationships after divorce and many little things that you don’t even pay attention to right away! And the general recommendations are as follows: Take your part of the responsibility for the divorce. This seemingly simple phrase has 2 important nuances! First, accept your part! Understand the situation, understand where your area of ​​responsibility lay, what mistakes you personally made! Secondly, take responsibility! There is no need to blame yourself, sprinkle ashes on your head and go to the nearest monastery to atone for your sins! Just honestly admit to yourself what of your actions/inactions led to the result. Completely end your marital relationship with your ex-wife. Let me explain: complete completion means the end of hope for such a turn: “Maybe we will get back together and pretend that nothing happened.” Divorce is divorce. Perhaps you will really make peace, get together, become a strong and happy family... such cases happen, even more often than we think... But! This will be a completely different relationship, which is possible only after you have completely experienced the one you are leaving now. This needs to be accounted for. And further! While you and your ex are throwing balloons at each other, while she is “a bitch who ruined her whole life” and you are “a goat who took away the best years of her life,” the relationship is not complete. If hostility and aggression have established between you, it means that you are trying to transform the relationship into something destructive instead of ending it. This means that these destructive relationships will haunt you and lower your self-esteem and self-confidence. Get outside support! The period after divorce is the period in which both “partners” are especially vulnerable. This means you need the support of those who can understand and support you, and simply listen. Realize yourself in other areas of life! After a divorce, we have to admit a fact: married life has failed. On the plus side, there are many other areas in life. Pay attention to them! Increase your competence in other areas: pay attention to work, improve your professionalism, get involved in education, improve in your hobbies, communicate with friends, help your parents! Be successful where it is possible to be successful! This point, of course, is trivial. This may not be what you wanted to read in such an article, but still... Work with a psychologist. With its help, find an internal support point and establish peace within yourself. Be careful when choosing a psychologist. It may be safer for you to work exclusively with a man, because... Women are subconsciously expected to be a threat. Or maybe it’s the other way around: it’s better to choose a female psychologist to get acceptance and!