If a river has no banks, it will never reach the ocean. Osho If you can be ordered around casually, if your own child shouts at you with displeasure, you are not the head of the family. You are not the head of the family. “It’s impossible to force anyone to do anything. He’s not interested in anything other than YouTube and games,” “He’s 8 years old, but he doesn’t care about me,” “We do everything for him, but he grows up insensitive and ungrateful,” “Why does he put me in a corner. I put it in the corner, and he jumps out. I don’t want to show my helplessness “We bought a cool iPhone for our child’s 8th birthday, and a tablet for the New Year so that it would be no worse than others,” “The child says: what do you mean I can’t? I want, I need!!!” - parental “confessions” begin in different ways, but the reasons are very similar in essence. Many parents, who are very competent and love their children, experience difficulties in raising their children. In our opinion, there are several reasons for this: “Consumer society” imposes distorted values ​​on us, including in the field of raising children. Modern parents’ refusal of traditional values ​​in education. Many parents would like their children to not only love them, but also consider them their friends. They like that the child considers them “cool” and communicates with them on equal terms, as with peers. Parents who work a lot and are often absent turn into holiday parents, trying to compensate for their temporary absence in the child’s life with entertainment and gifts. Different demands made by the father and mother, parents and grandparents. Personal characteristics of parents. (For example, uncertainty, anxiety, lack of formation of one’s own personal boundaries, personal immaturity) Raising children in a single-parent family. For many, discussions about the “rights of the child” pull the rug out from under them. As one child said: “According to the International Convention on the Rights of the Child, you, mother, have no right to enter my room without my permission. So get out immediately, otherwise I’ll call the police!” (by the way, the Western juvenile primacy of children’s rights is completely unacceptable for Russia, says Children’s Ombudsman Pavel Astakhov). The formal reason for writing the article was a story in the program “Man and the Law” entitled “School Cruelty. Modern society turns teenagers into monsters. They learned to be rude, to “download rights” and forgot how to learn. Where is the exit?". And the solution, in our opinion, is to teach parents how to form and maintain parental authority. And often the conversation should not just be about increasing psychological and pedagogical literacy, but about providing emergency assistance to parents in building relationships with their children. We find the point of view of psychologists interesting, who believe that most behavioral disorders in children are associated with problems in the formation of personal boundaries. For example, Visible problem Boundary problem Poor grades Misunderstanding of cause and effect relationships Commanding other children Disrespectful of other people's boundaries Doesn't listen Not afraid of consequences Behaves defiantly Believes that he has special rights