From the author: There is nothing wrong with disappointment, as well as with being fascinated by someone! None of our feelings and states are superfluous or meaningless. It is important to understand what their task is .There is nothing wrong with disappointment, as well as with being fascinated by someone! None of our feelings and states are superfluous or meaningless. It is important to understand what their task is. For example, fascination, aka idealization (a term in Gestalt therapy) it falling in love is a very important and necessary state. Charm makes people very accepting. Under its influence, critical thinking is completely turned off... and a person becomes able to ACCEPT! someone else’s point of view, other values, easily, almost imperceptibly, adopts the habits of another person, the horizons and, in general, the range of reactions and feelings broaden significantly... If the love is mutual, each other’s enrichment occurs: starting with films and books and ending with habits and worldview. ..In no other state is a person able to be so ready to accept! As for disappointment, it is also a very natural, but no less valuable and important stage... Disappointment completes the process of enchantment.... And it is very is important... otherwise we would completely dissolve in other people, lose ourselves. Recently, while thinking about this topic, an image came to me that makes these processes more visual. Imagine that two people are pieces of ice. Moreover, the composition of the liquid is completely different. And while they are in a “solid” state, they do not interact with each other at all. But there comes a moment when the temperature of the relationship between them begins to rise. Usually one of them begins to “melt” first, and if the second decides to be “melted,” then this process extends to him. After some time, the liquids mix and the composition of both is significantly enriched. Often during this period, people change beyond recognition. But then the next stage occurs - the relationship gradually “cools down.” People return to the “solid” state again, but their composition is different. It has become much richer, more meaningful, deeper. This process happens more than once in our lives. It has different shades, but its goal is the same: internal enrichment, expansion of thinking and the prism through which we perceive this world and ourselves in it. And this is not only about the love of a man and a woman, it is also about friendship and about passion for new ideas, religions, leaders, musicians... Everything that piques your interest makes you want to absorb, absorb and change thanks to this. It’s as if we are putting ourselves back together piece by piece that we take from other people. We gradually turn into ourselves. The process of falling in love and disappointment is as natural and dual as the ebb and flow of tides, summer and winter, sunrises and sunsets. I feel sorry for people who believe that someone has charmed them , and then disappointed. Awareness does not deprive us of emotions, but gives us the opportunity to take responsibility for these processes in our lives. And understanding them allows us to enjoy them or at least accept them. When you understand how everything works, disappointment generally changes its shades , it is no longer associated with the devaluation of a person, but rather with sadness about the loss of a fortune.