Have you ever been speechless during an important event? Can you use a personal example to tell us about how a person suddenly literally ceases to be the master of the situation due to muscle tension, tremors, weak legs and sudden nausea? Does it happen that waiting for something doesn’t even allow you to breathe normally? Congratulations! If you have experienced this at least once in your life, your alarm system is fine. Its main function is to help us survive. Although in ordinary life we ​​are much less likely to be exposed to mortal danger than our distant ancestors, the mechanism of anxiety has remained unchanged. When our brain interprets a situation as dangerous, the sympathetic nervous system mobilizes the body, and we have absolutely no control over this. Only today can a situation that is not directly related to human life be considered dangerous. Speaking in public, a job interview, a date, even writing an email or making a phone call—all of these and more can cause anxiety. Physical tension and discomfort completely capture us and prevent us from achieving our goals. This is why it is so important to learn relaxation techniques. Before we look at the techniques themselves, there are some important points to emphasize. Relaxation is a skill that needs to be learned. This means that regular practice is needed so that the body remembers the principle. You need to start practicing when you are calm or the level of anxiety is average - any skill is difficult to learn in a state of excessive stress, and relaxation is no exception. It is better to train in a situation close to life (one in which equipment may actually be needed). It is better to sit in a chair rather than lie down, for the same reasons. But it is important to create suitable conditions for yourself: turn off communications, ask your loved ones not to distract you. Don’t let the feeling of hunger or thirst confuse you. Have a snack before you start training. Determine which technique is right for you. Once the main points have been learned, start training in vivo - that is, in real conditions. Follow the principle of small steps, start using techniques in situations with low levels of anxiety. Now let's move on to specific tools. Breathing exercises When we are worried or afraid, our breathing quickens so that the heart can deliver more oxygen to different parts of the body, “preparing them for fight or flight.” But breathing too quickly and deeply can cause other unpleasant symptoms: ringing in the ears, weakness, fainting. This can be avoided by learning breathing techniques. You need to focus on breathing. Please note that the inhaled air is slightly cooler than the exhaled air. Let go of all random thoughts. Say “inhale” and “exhale” to yourself. Counting is also allowed: count the number of inhalations and exhalations. Another version of the breathing exercise is related to breathing control. In moments of fear and anxiety, it seems that we are running out of air. But the paradox is that you actually need to learn to breathe more slowly. Count to four as you inhale, hold your breath for 1-2-3-4, exhale slowly for a count of four, and hold your breath again for 1-2-3-4. If we drew this technique, it would turn out to be a square. Changing your focusAnother way to cope with anxiety is to think about something else. There may be several options. The goal is to shift the focus of attention from internal symptoms of anxiety (shortness of breath, tremors, cold extremities, increased sweating, intense blushing, etc.) to the external world or an imaginary object. Counting and observation: count all the red objects around (or blue, green - color does not matter). Observe the sounds, their physical side: where they come from, where the source is, where it is not, where the sounds are more intense, where they are less audible. If this is a speech, take a break from the content, imagine that you are a foreigner and don’t understand a word. Treat sounds as a foreign phenomenon that can be studied.Imagination: imagine your loved one.