The partner directly says, hints, expresses with all his actions that he wants to break up. You are scared by the very thought of breaking up your relationship. You definitely don’t want to break up. It doesn’t matter for what reasons, but if the partner packs his suitcase and leaves, this circumstance will be a real disaster for you. There was obvious opposition from the parties. What to do? First, let's outline what you definitely don't need to do. If you really want, of course, you can, but nothing good will come of it. Get down on your knees and pray, “Don’t leave me. Without you I will die. What should I do so that everything is as before?” – Don’t do that. Good old blackmail “If you leave, I will do this, I will do this...”. – Don’t do that. Ignore the problem and live as if a catastrophe is not approaching. – Don’t do that. Provoke your partner with phrases like: “Well, get out.” I never loved you. It will be better without you." In the hope that he will get scared and change his mind. – Don’t do this. What a reasonable person would do: Step 1. Admit the problem Admit that there is a problem. Your family life is at risk. In order to solve a problem, you first need to understand its causes. Find out why they want to leave you. Sit down at the negotiating table. Step 2. Develop a realistic view of the future The illusion that everything is fine in your relationship has already led to the partner gaining the strength to leave. Indulging in your infantilism further will not lead to good things. Admit that things are bad and you will work hard to improve the situation. Recognize that things may not work out and he/she will leave. The main thing is! Recognize the other person's right to choose his destiny. His right may conflict with your desires, and you are ready to admit defeat and start building a new life. Breaking up a relationship is not death, not nuclear war, or cancer. As soon as you look at the situation objectively, you will be able to make rational decisions, and neurosis and panic will recede. Step 3. Seek help The first thing you need to do is sort out your head, extinguish the emotional storm. Many people cannot do this on their own. A good solution would be therapy with a psychologist. The first stage is personal therapy. There is no need to force your partner to see a psychologist, assuring him and yourself that “the doctor will fix everything.” You need help. Until you realize your “dark sides”, and they definitely exist, otherwise they wouldn’t break off relations with you, you will not be able to correct the situation. Instead, you will continue to exhibit the same behavioral patterns and emotional reactions as before. Understand that this is exactly what your partner is running from. You can only suggest that your partner go to a psychologist. It should be his choice. Going to a psychologist under duress is immoral and guaranteed to be unproductive. You can offer to undergo family therapy only after you have completed several therapy consultations in person. If, after personal therapy, the partner sees even the slightest signs of changes in your behavior and his (the partner’s) perception, he will probably willingly agree to family therapy. Remember that we are considering a situation where a person has only indicated his intentions, expressed his thoughts, but has not yet left , had not yet said “I have definitely decided to leave” and left. Thus, the person himself is in a state of uncertainty. We do not consider the situation of “the resurrection of Lazarus,” when the relationship is dead, the beloved has long left his father’s bed, and you still cannot calm down and flatter yourself with hopes of a miracle. In this case, welcome to fortune tellers and midwives. Step 4. Sit down at the negotiating table The arena for your negotiations on how to live or not live together could be a psychologist’s office or the kitchen of your apartment; this is not a fundamental issue. It is important in what state of consciousness you sit at this table. If you have realized your “dark sides”. If, after serious thought, you become convinced that life without this person will be worse than life with him. If you are ready to discuss,.