They always know what exactly you want better than you do. They have advice for all occasions, or, more accurately, clear instructions. How to deal with over-controlling people without losing yourself? Let's be honest, we all get very irritated when someone tells us what to do in a given situation. But if we are talking about a person we barely know, we can stop communicating with him without any problems. What if this “smart guy” is your loved one? It’s much more complicated here. The peculiarity of a hyper-controlling person is that he has a deep conviction: he has every right to give advice to everyone around him. However, deep down in his soul, this person cannot emotionally separate from others; in fact, he is dependent on them. Why is it so difficult to resist the control of another person? Firstly, we may not immediately notice this control. Indeed, in most cases, a person does not put moral pressure, he is simply “interested” and “shares his opinion.” And it looks something like this: “I think you should not communicate with her. It won't get you anywhere." "Are you really going to buy these pants?! But they don’t suit you at all!” At first glance, it’s hard to see pressure and hypercontrol in these harmless phrases, right? But even if you notice something like this, you can very often ignore the person’s intrusion into your life. After all, you don’t want to spoil your relationship. How to recognize a hyper-controlling person? Focus on these signs: He is always right. And period. He behaves as if he knows you better than you know yourself. If you do not agree with him, it means that you automatically hold an erroneous opinion. He is not able to doubt his position and, even more so, hear the arguments of another person. How not to succumb to the influence of such a person? The first thing you need to do is to find your inner “I”. In a relationship with a hyper-controlling person, it sometimes hides too deeply. Determine your own point of view regarding a particular situation. Understand what categories you think in and what principles you adhere to. The best way not to succumb to the influence of the “controller” is to strengthen your “I” every day. The second thing I recommend paying attention to is self-esteem. In communication with the controller, it can rapidly decrease. Don’t let the phrases “You can’t do anything without me” and “Are you sure you can handle it?” influence your self-perception. In a personal consultation, I will help you strengthen your “I” and learn to quickly expose hyper-controlling people! Sincerely, Your psychologist, Ilya Akhmedov.