I'm not a robot

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I'm not a robot

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It is very difficult to admit to yourself that you have no strength. For some reason it seems like this is the end. Everyone will turn away, reject, not accept. Who needs you such a weakling? Yes, and you will kill yourself. How is it possible to get tired when you didn’t even exert yourself? How can you stop when everything around you is already, but I haven’t yet? Do you hear this voice? He's so loud, well-produced, confident, judgmental. With a lot of arguments and sounds very plausible. There is nowhere to hide or hide from him. However, it no longer provides much motivation. And somewhere deep inside I want to cry. Because it hurts from such rigidity. It hurts to always be extreme. It hurts not to have the right to feelings. It is painful to look for a second and third wind in yourself when it is already obvious that there is none. And so secretly I want someone to take pity and accept, support, and not judge. Because I'm really tired. Because I have no strength. Because the last time I took a vacation was two years ago, but I can’t really remember when. Because I’m already confused in endless to-do lists, and my calendar is bursting at the seams. And you still want to sign up for a pool or a massage, but someday in a couple of weeks, a month, two... From fatigue you can hardly get up in the morning and somehow pour a liter of coffee into yourself. You want to cry. Your body aches, your back hurts, your head hurts, and in the evening before going to bed you just can’t relax. Exhausted. You're crying. Hurt. You're crying. Only at this moment do you seem to understand that fatigue is real. That the resource is really at zero. And this cannot be ignored. And now this is the most important thing in life. Because if there is no health, there will be no more business or anything at all. You're crying. You're crying. You're crying. You let go with fear. Unloading. You are surprised to discover that the world is not collapsing because you are tired. Everything somehow copes and sorts itself out while you regain your strength. Nobody turns away. Life is going. You calm down. Tears dry up. Where there is an accuser, there is always hidden the one who is hurting. And seeing, hearing, understanding and accepting his pain, we can change lives.

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