Clients often ask a very important question: what level of “anger” can still be analyzed? I would reformulate: at what level of anger is it still possible to adequately express and present to a partner. Anger in its development goes through several stages, from the first - dissatisfaction, then irritation, anger, anger, rage. When a person’s psychological boundaries are violated, a feeling arises that helps to notice this, and it is aimed at protecting these very boundaries. In this matter, everything is connected: the feeling of one’s own and others’ boundaries, self-esteem, the feeling and awareness of one’s feelings, the ability to express them. Often we do not notice or brush aside small dissatisfaction, considering it rude or insignificant to talk about it. Here it is! Dissatisfaction is the first sign of anger. Irritation is the next step, anger accumulates, a person gets annoyed at... something or someone. Usually this stage is already well noticed by the author himself. But whether to show or report this is a question that everyone decides in their own way. Decent, indecent, acceptable, unacceptable, useful, not useful - there are so many ethical norms and rules that prohibit people from reporting - my boundary has been violated, I am dissatisfied with this, or I am angry. If anger is not expressed at this stage, further accumulation occurs, because the partner does not know that he has crossed someone else’s border, because he was not informed about it. There is another option, he knows and then he deliberately violates someone else’s personal border, but the person does not protect his borders! Anger. Be that as it may, the next stage is obvious anger at the offender. At this stage, you can still report it, but it’s much more difficult to express your anger so that you don’t end up in excruciating pain for the way you expressed it. After all, the feeling has already acquired a high intensity and is rushing out, so consciousness may not have time to control the action. Anger and Rage are the next stages, when managing one’s behavior becomes even more uncontrollable. For very reserved people who hide their feelings, do not express “ show your emotions in public”, feelings do not disappear anywhere, remaining in the body, they “come out” in the form of psychosomatic diseases - pain, tearfulness, fears, isolation... the list is very long.