It would seem that what could be attractive to a woman in an aggressive man? Especially considering that sooner or later his aggression will inevitably be directed at her and their children. Nevertheless, there are many women who choose aggressive men as objects of desire. Let's consider the psychological factors that influence the choice of these women.1. Low self-esteem Self-esteem greatly affects one's sense of self as a valuable and whole person. For women with low self-esteem, these “strong men” are attractive because in their fantasies they have qualities that they themselves lack: courage, strength, self-confidence. By the way, this female fantasy may have nothing to do with reality, because male aggression may hide exactly the opposite things: cowardice, weakness and one’s own shaky self-esteem.2. Upbringing past experience If in her parents’ family it was the norm for a girl to use aggression, physical or emotional violence in relationships, then as an adult it will be very difficult for her to draw the line between acceptable and unacceptable manifestations of aggression. And the stronger and longer the girl experiences frustration, the more difficult it is for her to survive the infringement of her rights and desires by her parent. This leads her to seek an aggressive partner who will provide her with the feeling of dominance and control that she unconsciously craves. Therefore, aggression can not only attract such a woman, but also excite her. At a minimum, aggressive behavior will be acceptable or tolerable for her.3. The need for excitement and risk Sometimes the desire to be close to an aggressive man is due to a woman’s need for the adrenaline rush that his behavior provides. True, such an adrenaline swing can be extremely dangerous for her. It is important to understand where this need comes from and how it can be satisfied in more gentle ways than in a relationship with an aggressive partner. For example, driving a car, “adrenaline” sports, shooting with military weapons and other stereotypically “masculine” ways to tickle your nerves. A relationship with an aggressive man can be destructive and draining. If you feel attracted to these types of men, reflect on your childhood history, self-esteem and need for adrenaline. Perhaps these psychological factors influence your choice. This means, if desired, this can be changed in order to build a respectful and comfortable relationship with the right person in the future. Sincerely, your psychologist, expert on interpersonal relationships Olga Drovorub Get a consultation Subscribe to my articles, it will be interesting!