Talking about your feelings is not an easy task for everyone. Many people are afraid to be vulnerable and fear that their statements may be misunderstood or judged negatively. Agree, it’s hard when you are not understood or your feelings are not shared. Let’s figure it out: how to start talking openly, honestly and sincerely about your feelings? Below I offer 7 steps that will help you start expressing what is accumulating inside. Step 1. Admit it your feelings and emotions in front of you. First of all, it is important to know what emotions are. Yes, the paradox is that emotions are often confused with action. When I ask a client a question: “What were the emotions then?”, I often get an answer something like: “Well, I cried and didn’t know how to calm down.” Crying is not an emotion, it is an action caused by an emotion that you cannot name. Acknowledging and understanding your feelings is the first step to expressing them openly. Take care of your emotional literacy by examining your reactions to different situations and identifying their sources. Under the first point I leave you a sign of emotions 👇🏼 Step 2. Having decided to talk about your feelings, find the right moment. You don't always need to talk about them immediately. Choose a time and place to speak and ensure you will be heard without interruption or fuss. Step 3: Analyze the other person. Not all people are “suited” to openly communicating about feelings. Try to open up to those people who listen to you without judgment and sympathize with your feelings. Talking openly is a good help for developing trust, mutual relationships will become even stronger. Step 4. Use “I-messages”. Instead of conveying your feelings in the form of accusations or criticism towards the other person, use “I messages”. For example, instead of saying, “You always ignore me,” say, “I feel invisible when you don't pay attention to me.” “I-messages”, in my opinion, are a very cool tool in the context of healthy communication! Step 5. Ask your interlocutor questions and listen to the answers carefully. Having opened the topic of your feelings, it is important to also pay attention to the feelings and experiences of the other person. Ask open-ended questions to better understand his point of view and desires. Be considerate and tolerant. Step 6: Practice empathy. Having learned to observe your feelings and emotions, it is important to move on to studying the emotions of other people. Improve your empathy skills, learn to put yourself in the shoes of others. When a person sees that you are open and understand him like no one else, sharing feelings will be much easier. Step 7. Be prepared for negative reactions. Some people may have difficulty accepting open expressions of feelings. Be tolerant and remember that if someone is struggling, you can tell them these steps to help them understand you a little better. Give them time and space to understand and accept your emotions and learn new expressions of feelings. Be open and frank, but only to the extent that you yourself are ready for! And a little motivation: