About sexuality, childhood and family problems from the Course of Short-Term Strategic Therapy (SST) of the Center for Strategic Consulting and Therapy from Arkady Minin. — — — Food and sex should be spontaneous. Sexuality is within. The partner only helps to manifest it. In men, when they are afraid, the genitals shrink. Sexual relationships emphasize and form real relationships. — — — Problems of children and adolescents. Until about 12 years of age, we treat children as animals that need to be trained. There is no reflection, and there is no need to waste time on explanations. If a child under 11-12 years old has a problem, this is 100% the responsibility of the parents. To balance the relationship with the child, the first task is to maintain the hierarchy. It is extremely important that the child knows his place. It is not possible for a child to be at the top of the hierarchy, it is very difficult. The correct position is: “I am your mother, and therefore you must obey.” The healthy relationship of parents to the child: “Oh, were you born? Well, come with us. Do not want? We have fun without you.” Adolescents are divided into obedient and disobedient – ​​this is the case. Two - reflection arises, which turns the animal into a person. The task of parents of teenagers is to maintain boundaries. A teenager always fluctuates from neurotic to psychotic, and in emotions from mania to depression. This is the norm. — — — Relationships between a man and a woman. The main source of problems in relationships is that they do not represent the psyche of the partner. The basis is biology. If we don’t look there, we won’t understand. Men line up in a hierarchy, and women choose from it, and a normal woman’s choice is pragmatic. A man with a mature psyche does not have many needs. A woman must want something, then everything will be fine. In homosexual couples, one has a female psyche, the other has a male one. The problems are the same as in heterosexual couples. Women take meanings and values ​​from men. For women: you cannot believe a single word a man says, you need to look at his actions. For men: a woman’s words are important, to be able to hear them. Relationships are not a photo, but a movie, often with an unknown plot and an unpredictable ending. Nature does not need us to stay together. Rather, it separates. Love is actions to stay together. PS Fears, panic, obsessions, endless doubts? Problems with your children? Contact us.