So, let's assume that the first acquaintance was successful. What's next? You are optimistic, in love and want to spend as much time as possible with your loved one's family. Here it would be good to ask yourself a question: how ready are you to build relationships in this family? If you don’t have serious plans, then you shouldn’t start getting closer. Children have a hard time with breaking ties. There is no need to play family if there are no such plans. Adults can spend time together without the presence of children. If your plans are quite serious, then you need to start building a good relationship with your child gradually. Take your time. Especially if you plan to become one family. An extremely bad option is when, after the first meeting, the child is taken aback by the news that his mother and her friend are getting married and moving in together. You will almost certainly receive resistance, explicit or hidden. If you have serious intentions, you need to begin rapprochement gradually. First, general meetings should take place on neutral territory. You shouldn’t join family traditions ahead of time, and, especially, you shouldn’t change or destroy them. If, for example, mother and son watch a movie together every Saturday night, don't rush to join them. For a child, this may be too aggressive an invasion, especially when there is no trusting relationship yet. Moreover, there is no need to distract the child’s mother with messengers and calls. Islands of stability and security will allow the child to quickly adapt and get used to the parent’s new relationship. With children of different ages, adaptation will be different. Many studies suggest that children under nine years of age adapt most easily to changes in the family. If the child is older, there may be more difficulties (but it is not a fact that there will be any; each case is individual). In addition, according to the same studies, it is more difficult for girls to adapt to a new family than for boys. At the initial stage, do not rush to arrange frequent family meetings. The principle here is good - the quieter you go the further you go. Your ability to keep your distance and build rapport slowly will work to your advantage in the long run. An interesting study (Bray.J., Berger, SH 1993.) says that the well-being of a couple is higher when the stepfather keeps some distance in the first six months of family life, but later takes more active measures to bring closer together. To schedule a consultation, write to me in private messages or WhatsApp +79941358003