I'm not a robot

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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

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You went to bed late yesterday, devoting time to thinking about upcoming affairs on the eve of the New Year, a corporate party, preparing a children's party or something else. And today you got up “broken”, the weather is not happy and you decided that you can devote another hour to social networks... And then you realize with horror that it’s already lunch... and nothing has been done that was planned.. Sound familiar? Why did this yesterday’s internal motivation to get things off the ground again turned into “Groundhog Day” today? Surprisingly, before you would have been called lazy/lazy and rewarded with a comparison with the fabulous Ivan, who lay on the stove for 30 years... I wonder if Ivan had procrastination or was he simply (as they would say now) in energy conservation mode? Before labeling yourself “lazy” or “lazy”, let’s figure out why this happens? Let’s say you need to go shopping for gifts, but instead, out of nowhere, “urgent things” arise: wash the windows, change the curtains, do the laundry, and in general you haven’t dusted for a long time... and it’s important to do this right now, this minute!! At such moments, stop for a second and ask yourself a question: ❓ Why is this (window washing and vacuum cleaner) so important now? ❓ Why can't I do this later? ❓What can my desire to delay a shopping trip indicate? (Or the action that you are putting off) ❓What do I gain by postponing this action? And here we have gradually approached several reasons for postponing things. Why are you ready to do anything, even more energy-consuming than those whose deadlines are already starting to “tighten”? Firstly, the matter may not be the most unpleasant: call a person with whom you have poor contact, a bad relationship, ask for a service with a high probability of refusal, go to the dentist, etc. Then postponing this task until tomorrow brings us temporary relief, which means the following chain is fixed in our head: I put it off - I feel better. What will the brain do? That's right - try to persuade him to repeat this in every possible way in order to save you from possible unpleasant experiences. Go there, I won’t tell you where! Bring it, I won’t tell you what! It happens that we are faced with such a task that we do not know where to start from. Let's say you are in a new position and they ask you to do something that you have not done before and do not know what exactly is expected of you. Or you need to make a report, and you just don't know where to start. Well, or you have an ambitious goal in front of you, but you have no idea how it can be achieved... And the days pass only in thoughts about it and how great it would be to go on vacation to the Maldives, move to a new apartment, get a higher position position etc. But it is not yet clear to you how to do this. Often our perfectionism forces us to put off starting a task. Our internal anxiety to do something less than perfect literally paralyzes our movement towards the goal! The result should not just be good, it should be perfect! But if writing dissertations is not your profession, or if you are not a professional chef, then expecting a job at the level of a doctor of science or a chef the first time would not be rational. What if you just start doing it and hone your skills and make the necessary adjustments as you progress? As part of cognitive behavioral therapy, I suggest you ask yourself the question: What is the worst thing that will happen if my work is not entirely ideal? What's the worst thing that will happen if my work isn't perfect? Fear of criticism. As always, we cannot do without the influence of our parents and grandmothers on our behavior. Have you ever had a time in your childhood or youth when you brought your drawing or some kind of craft to show your parents, and the answer was an emotionless “good”, or even worse - a devaluing one: “Masha is better at drawing..” ( sculpt, ride a bike, write an essay, you only translate products - for your first culinary attempts). I think almost everyone has something like this

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