In the course of many years of work, my colleagues and I came to the conclusion that if you raise a man, you will be a teacher for him, and not a beloved woman. Even if it’s your favorite teacher. Therefore, as soon as you take on such a thankless task, you should immediately keep in mind that even if you manage to reshape something in your own way, it will be a slightly different man. And it is quite possible that he (if you are a lady) will no longer like you. This is where the phrase came from: “You raise a man for another woman.” If you need it, then go ahead! In addition, remember folklore: only Baba Yaga hovered in the bathhouse, fed and watered the good fellow. But the fair maiden did not dirty her right hand with such a thing! In general, raising a man is not much different from raising anyone else, including pets, children and other relatives. Namely: encourage good things, punish bad things. You can, of course, only use carrots or sticks, but an intimidated loved one, ready to attack the moment you relax, is not the best basis for family happiness. And from the gingerbread, men get so excited and relaxed so quickly that it’s amazing how from the wall behind which you were going to hide from adversity, a person turns into another child on the chest of a kind mother. It is important to combine sugar with newspaper in approximately a ratio of 5 to 1: five encouragements - one “darling, how could you!..” Okay, men, 10 to 1. So that his life with you is still one that you would like to continue - together, side by side. BUT! The formula was more accurate: good - define - encourage, bad - define - punish. You know, experienced livestock breeders say that naughty small livestock (cats, dogs, polecats, etc.) should be punished immediately after committing an offense (such as an overturned vase) - then they will forget and will be very surprised by the sudden punishment that has befallen them. Men, fortunately, have much better memory and logical connections, but to determine precisely that, dear, it is your dirty shoes in the middle of the white fluffy carpet that are now bringing upon you the righteous wrath of the gods of your spouse, is extremely important. And not just “you piss me off every day.” And it needs to be defined as clearly as possible and – another important element – ​​constructively. That is, if you tell him: “Don’t buy such small potatoes again,” then it is not clear whether it is possible to buy not such, but other small potatoes. It’s better to define: “Next times, please buy potatoes the size of a chicken egg to a tomato,” or even better: “Darling, I really like it when you buy potatoes 7-10 cm in diameter, so smooth and clean that you can cook dinner becomes very easy and enjoyable.” I also really like the Kuklachev Cat Theater. At one time, its founder said that he noticed their personal characteristics in cats - and developed them. Your man likes to, say, come over after work and sit on the sofa. Wonderful! And on the sofa everything is already ready so that the eldest’s notebooks with homework can be checked and the youngest can be rocked and swaddled without leaving the strategic point. Or a bowl of unpeeled potatoes with a knife, and a bottle of beer at the bottom. Okay, the important thing here is not to teach other bad habits. Is your man a champion of running in his underpants? Come on! Here's a list of foods that definitely help tone up, and of course, new briefs are on the list at the end of the route. One of my clients even used her husband’s smoking for good: a cigarette in the entrance = throwing out garbage. So, cigarette after cigarette, the house has already been cleaned, groceries have been bought, the carpets have been washed, the dog has been walked, and so on. Involuntarily, smoking will become less frequent! That is, in addition to simple behaviorism (stimulus - response), one must also use feminine cunning and wisdom. Put your upbringing into an attractive package. And remember that after all, your loved one is in front of you. Who probably also raises you. And he wants something from you. Therefore, you can also spend your strength and zeal on ensuring that his upbringing gives fruitful shoots to you. You see, then it might bear fruit too!