Very, very cool specialist - the one whose focus is on you! Can you imagine? It is you, the client, who needs to feel comfortable, special, “right and good” or just completely accepted. If a psychologist, coach, consultant, anyone, is so focused on his figure that he has grown to universal proportions, or is concerned about his role more than his clients - this is just a narcissistic figure and it is worth looking for prototypes in your childhood - was your mother so much absorbed in herself and her charming figure or her own processes more than you? You don’t need to be fascinated by a psychologist, think that he or she is super cool. It is enough that when you leave the specialist, you feel quite good. You feel good, you think good about yourself, and not about him or her. If we talk about prototypes, then let it be “a good enough mother”, if at first you cannot do without transference. Not ideal, not the best in the world, but alive, real and she takes care of you. Understand that this is a common trend for making money - psychologists are taught and lured into “creating a personal brand,” simply because they also need to earn money and win the competition. Yes, market rules apply in this area - marketing. What shines brighter attracts attention faster. The brilliance is not only in external attributes, but in the “image of a tough specialist.” Most often, apart from PR, a person cannot stand something that really lasts. But he usually justifies this by his inability to “realize the steepness of the method.” If you feel that a person is not suitable for you, because you are a speck in the universe at his or her reception, maybe you shouldn’t throw yourself into the millstone? In fact, you are a fairly good specialist focused as much as possible on his client (during work), leaving his super-personality for his own life, without acting it out in the office and on people who come with their problems. A fairly good psychologist, I assure you, in his free time is absorbed in his own work on herself and working through her own traumas and is well aware of her own limitations as an individual and an ordinary person. If you really work deeply on yourself (which is mandatory for any specialist), you will not have the idea of ​​being “super-cool.” Moreover, this is not the focus of a psychologist’s attention at all. Therefore, as a specialist and as an ordinary person, in my life and work I personally choose to communicate and address those people who have enough modesty, humility and intelligence to recognize that they are the same people , ordinary mortals, not at all ideal. But what is truly a cool quality is love. Not “mom-dad”, not a “sugar substitute” for trauma, playing along with the client in his/her trauma, but true human love from person to person. A truly great psychologist is one who sees YOU, and the healthy part of you, despite being aware of the pain, trauma and limitations that obscure it. And it is with your vision and focus on everything favorable in you that can truly help heal from the limitations that prevent you from seeing yourself in this beautiful light. Long live healthy stereotypes about psychology! If you would like to sign up for a trial consultation, I offer a 20-minute one online express diagnostics. This is a combination of introductory psychological counseling and field therapy. To register, write in PM or by phone.