It seems that there is no one in the photo, but this is not so. If you look closely, where the road turns and goes into the distant distance, my son is running. He cannot turn any further, and he uses the will given to him 100%. And I look at him and think: Well, how? How to let him go into this huge, unpredictable, beautiful and dangerous world? Well, somehow, just go back to the fact that mom is a psychologist. And remember the basics of theory. According to Erikson, a person goes through 8 stages throughout life, and each of them determines the next. From 3 to 6 years – the third stage, the period of formation of a very important decision: “I can take initiative and this is GOOD”, “I’m interested, but I can’t = fear of the world and a feeling of guilt.” Children under one year old form a decision about basic trust or distrust in the world, three-year-olds learn autonomy or the habit of doubting their abilities. And children aged 4-5 are great explorers. What? Where? How does the world work? How to influence him? What happens if you throw a stone into water? What about a tree branch? Why is the grass green? What's around the bend? And I know that if you support this pioneer in him, he will show initiative all his life. You can’t force him to sit in a job he doesn’t like, he won’t be tormented by a long choice, he won’t choose between bad and tolerable. Because he will have the habit of exploring this world, changing it to suit himself, contacting people and objects, choosing what he really wants. What if a parent criticizes or punishes? Stop where you are going! Why dirty again? Sit still! Don’t go/don’t take/DO NOT – then the child develops a very persistent feeling of guilt. Because running, jumping, laughing loudly, throwing stones and climbing through puddles are natural desires for a child, suggested by nature. And if my mother says that these desires are wrong, then what am I? Somewhat different. Wrong. Bad. Feelings of guilt and initiative are poorly compatible things. How scary it is to let him go, but you can’t escape it, you have to. Otherwise, my fear will slow him down all his life. I want him to have the courage to pursue any of his dreams. Sincerely, Sofia Pimenova