Nowadays a lot is written about counterdependent relationships in which one partner is emotionally distant. More often it is a man, after all, women tend to be much more emotionally involved in a relationship. From the outside, everyone looks something like this - she loves him, but he doesn’t. But... this is only from the outside... Most often, a man also wants emotional intimacy, but the fear of absorption and dependence on a woman outweighs, forcing him to distance himself and take a passive position, or even strive for separation. Such relationships are quite difficult. They are filled with endless double messages from a man, such as “I celebrated a wake for love” - “Never say: “Never”,” and they force a woman to be in constant discord, from not understanding what he really wants from her: to leave him alone or was nearby. Such a “taffe” in a relationship will end sooner or later, leaving behind a rather noticeable mental wound. How can you help yourself after such a “defeat” by love? First of all, delete all possible correspondence with him. In general, all of it!.. For a long time, being in a relationship with a man who “doesn’t know what he wants,” the woman developed a persistent habit of mentally delving into her behavior, looking for mistakes in it, trying to find a relationship between her actions and his attitude To her. If you try to “work on your mistakes” after a breakup by starting to re-read messages, you can get bogged down in feelings of despair, worthlessness and guilt. It is important to understand that his fear of relationships is NOT caused by YOU, but by his past! And now it doesn’t matter which one: be it a difficult childhood or a previous traumatic relationship. Delete the correspondence. There is no need to “finish off” yourself. Try to stop yourself from “digging in the past.” It will not change, even if you exhaust yourself trying to understand “Why did this happen?” Give yourself time to grieve over this failure in life and “get over” it. Allow yourself to feel any feelings towards the person who hurt you. Over time, they will dry up on their own if you don’t play the “I don’t care!” game. or “I forgive everything.” Do something that is truly interesting to you and gives you a feeling of success: your “faded” self-esteem is in dire need of support. Expand your horizons! There are a huge number of interesting people and things in the World that you had no idea about. Be interested in yourself and... live by choosing yourself.