From the author: Question - answerAuthor Evgeny Yakushev!!!!!!Question: !!A lot of goals, a lot of plans, I want a lot of things, a positive attitude. But I don’t know what to grab onto, I rush from one extreme to another, I can’t set priorities, I’m eating myself up from the inside. How to make friends between your “real self” and your “ideal self”? !!Answer:!!Let's try to figure out together what worries and bothers you so much and makes you rush from one extreme to another. This state always appears when you identify with the thought that something is missing. This thought itself creates internal tension and an alarming emptiness. But there is no point in fighting it. The only thing you need is to realize it and try to find your real self. The “ideal self” you are talking about is not you. This is just your idea of ​​yourself or your desire to be something different. And this is just a thought that you believed in. The problem arises when you don’t accept yourself for who you are and try to resist it. The secret to freeing yourself from these thoughts and experiences is to understand who you already are, not who you think you are. To do this, let's look at what you are not. All your thoughts, feelings, knowledge, intellect, memory, and everything that you consider yourself is not you. This is just your idea of ​​yourself. Because all this appears and disappears, but you remain. You are the one who observes all this. All this belongs to you, but is not you. You can say: my body, my thoughts, my feelings, my memory, my brain, my blood, etc., but you don’t talk about this “I”. If you right now for a second remove all ideas about yourself and the desire to change something and just pay attention to the fact that even after you don’t hold on to anything, something inside you realizes this. You will notice that even if there is nothing left, something is still aware of it in you. What could it be? Who is this witness to everything in your life? Pay attention to this. There is no mysticism here and you don’t have to believe in anything. Just watch without resistance or identification everything that is happening in your consciousness right now and you will notice that against the background of all this noise there is a real you who is observing all this. Is there concern there? Is there suffering there? Or maybe it’s the other way around - peace and quiet there? Take a look and check it out right now. The real you is the one who perceives it all. Every thought, every idea, emotion, sensation has its beginning and end, but who perceives it all? For whom is all this “theater”? Watch it now. If all these aspects were put aside because something in you knows them, observes them, then what remains? Can you be observed? All your experiences and thoughts are fleeting, but are you fleeting? Pay attention to this. All this comes and goes, but are you leaving? After all, all this is observed by you. You asked a good question. It's very deep. If you can answer these questions for yourself right now, without clinging to thoughts, you will notice that all your experiences on this matter were only thoughts, illusions in which you believed and identified. And if so, then everything you don’t need will simply not bother you and you will be able to discover exactly what you need now. And to better understand your strengths, try to answer these questions for yourself right now: 1. What have you managed to get good at in your life? 2. What comes most easily to you, almost without effort? 3. What is something you can do well that others find difficult? 4. On what issue do you like to express your opinion most confidently? 5. What abilities do your friends and girlfriends can't even come close to? 6. In what question do you honestly consider your acquaintances to be dummies compared to you? 7 On what issue do your acquaintances and friends consult you or ask you for help? These questions will help you see where your strengths already exist, which are a reflection of your.