Guilt can be real (healthy) and neurotic (toxic). Often with guilt comes a feeling of shame. It happens that at first we feel ashamed, and then we feel guilty, or vice versa, this is a natural logical chain. Healthy guilt, like shame, regulates our behavior on the positive side. Real guilt gives us the opportunity to correct the situation, change something, draw conclusions and move on. That is, a feeling of guilt manifests itself in specific situations where you are really to blame. For example: you were late, did not fulfill a promise, broke someone else’s thing - you can always apologize, allow yourself to make a mistake, repent and admit your guilt. Toxic guilt does not go away for a long time and prevents you from living your life. This is a state when I am guilty without guilt. Toxic guilt can be detected: If you constantly experience it in front of everyone or someone If you feel a sense of duty (I should, I didn’t - I’m guilty) If you often experience unconscious anxiety or anxiety Being guilty and feeling guilt are two completely different concepts. And the feeling of guilt where there is none in reality is toxic and destructive. Toxic guilt manifests itself in its constant living, regardless of situations or events, in a sense of duty to parents, friends, boss, partner, clients and oneself. It can also be transmitted to unconscious level from generation to generation (when a parent lives out of a sense of guilt or duty, the child unconsciously reproduces this model of behavior in his life). Guilt always speaks of blocked desires, does not allow one to satisfy needs and stops a person from self-realization. If there is a feeling of guilt, then one can easily detect violated personal boundaries, so it is difficult to refuse others and a person agrees to less than he would really like. Guilt can be a convenient and familiar way of life, because then there is no need to take responsibility for failures. Guilt unconsciously implies punishment , and in order not to get it in reality, a person punishes himself in advance with this feeling out of habit, injuries, psychosomatics, financial losses, lack of happy relationships. To get rid of guilt, it is important to work on: 1. Situations where you feel guilty (analyze, realize and be in this feeling, that is, live it, and not avoid it on the surface). You can get out of a problem only by realizing it.2. Learn to separate yourself from guilt. There is your fault, and there is YOU, who is greater than this.3. Realize where your guilt is real, and where it’s just your thoughts that are bothering you.4. Build your personal boundaries with others.5. And the most important thing is to complete the separation process, that is, to psychologically separate from your parents with the help of a psychologist, otherwise you can remain in a vicious circle for a long time, where guilt will be constant companions where it should not be. Book a consultation with me at +79500042139 (WhatsApp / sms).Come, I will be glad to help you!Arina Kazantseva | Psychologist