People often confuse concepts such as “being an adult” and “being grown up (mature).” The first word often refers to dates. In your passport. Numbers by which you know when your birthday is, how old you are and for communicating with others: “I’m 30 years old, I’m already big” “I’m 40 years old and I’m successful.” The second is an internal process that is neither (well neither at all) does not apply to the first. So you can see 70-year-olds in the body of 10-year-olds (with depression, disturbances in the emotional sphere, with psychosomatic diseases), in a word - Little Old People. Inner Oldies. Or observe a 7-8 year old girl in the body of a 30-35 year old woman. More often, these metamorphoses are difficult for us to comprehend in reality. They simply live in them. They suffer. Sometimes it really hurts me to watch them. Sometimes, some of them actively strive for self-knowledge. After all, “growing up” is precisely the process that allows you to live life to the fullest. Breathe deeply. Be aware of the whole reality around you. Be in contact with yourself and others. To be in integrity. To be in emotional development. To be natural, spontaneous. To be ALIVE, not artificial. We grow up when: 1. We stop waiting for. Monday. New Year. Happiness. A man or woman who will love us. The best job. Best time. Best way, etc. (you can continue the list yourself) And we know how to enjoy every moment (“here and now”), and not expectations. We know how to see the world around us, enjoy it, develop, experience different states.2. We openly say “NO”. To circumstances. Men. Women. Bosses. Lover. PARENTS. And we bear all the consequences of our refusal to others. And also when we are able to bear others’ NO. Without the feeling of abandonment and abandonment. 3. We withstand “difficult” feelings. Anger, sadness, melancholy, helplessness - all states of our own identity. We withstand all this without failures from reality. Without panic attacks (sudden fear), without sore throats (as “not being able to speak, to express yourself”), otitis (as “difficulty hearing and withstanding unpleasant words, sounds”). We endure with pain and tears. With self-support. With self-care . 4. We are not looking for crowds and entertainment (relationships, including one-time relationships), but are able to bear ourselves alone. In silence. In inner nirvana. 5. We do not look for excuses for our actions or inactions. We are responsible for ourselves and our lives. 6. We do not strive to change others, but understand that changes lie within ourselves. It's up to us to decide who will be next to us. Or it won't. Without demanding what other people need to be like for you to be comfortable with them. 7. Yes... and also... mature people enter into relationships (develop, are able to go deeper into them), while immature people get into trouble. With alcoholics, gambling boys-husbands and other objects... All other markers: the ability to control your feelings, “be comfortable and socially approved”, “be successful”, “be married”, “have children”, etc. - this is not about growing up! Inside we remain little wounded children, even if we have achieved social success. Despite everything. With respect to everyone who has walked the path of growing up, those who are walking and those who have not yet started.