Growing up, no longer a child, but not yet an adult, a teenager asks himself global questions: - Who am I? Why do I live? Do I have the right or not? Where can I go? What and who can I rely on? What is my place in life? And so on. In the personal sphere of a teenager, the formation of general principles, definitions, judgments, beliefs about permissibility and impermissibility, decency and dishonesty, acceptability and impermissibility of his actions in life, in planning his path takes place. In psychology, this is called an “identity crisis”, the successful outcome of which is the formation of a stable system of ideas about oneself and one’s place in the world, and the unfavorable outcome is “lostness”, uncertainty in these matters. Emotionally, teenagers also do not yet have autonomy. They resemble a battery. If he is charged, he runs around, is interested, and demonstrates his independence. As soon as the charge runs out, he goes to his parents and family to recharge. It is important for parents not to miss these moments: to be sensitive, open, available for communication. The teenager himself will come, tell everything, share his experiences, secrets, and ask for advice. But this will not happen at the moment when the parent wants to know about the teenager’s life, but only when he himself decides to be ready to communicate (when his emotional battery is low). The formation of a successful personal identity of a teenager ends with an understanding of the continuity of life, the cause-and-effect relationships of his actions, thoughts, actions and life events, and the acceptance of responsibility for oneself. How does a teenager look for answers to his global questions? What methods do our growing children use to answer the question of their self-determination, to form the identity of an adult? A teenager uses the following mechanisms to search for identity: 1. Checking prohibitions and boundaries. Violating the prohibitions of his elders, the teenager tries life, asking the question: What is possible? What's not allowed? A teenager considers it very important to break prohibitions: “Will I get away with it or not?” For their own development, a teenager simply needs to “get the hang of” the prohibitions, to understand their meaning and necessity. He often deliberately breaks certain rules, testing the strength of the word of his elders, observing the consequences of his actions, and taking actions associated with risk. That is why strict requirements and prohibitions in communicating with a teenager are contraindicated; their effect most often turns out to be the opposite. By conducting such experiments, the teenager feels for those boundaries where he “can’t get away with it.” He is curious: will there really be punishment for violating prohibitions, or will he still be able to disobey and act at his own discretion. The teenager learns to accept responsibility for his actions. This occurs as a violation of the prohibitions of parents, family, and society. Only by violating certain prohibitions, accepting their validity, and testing them through their own experience, does a teenager learn independence in life. 2. Experiments on the body, its endurance and capabilities. Teenagers love to gather on the roofs of houses, balance over a precipice, stand at the edge of a cliff, jump from great heights, drive at top speed and perform other feats. They are wondering: will I fall or not, will I crash or not, will I die or will I still remain alive, and if I die, how will it be? Behind these risky actions is curiosity, getting a drive from new sensations. When performing an action associated with risk, a teenager at this moment does not think about his loved ones, that his action may upset or frighten his parents, and even more so, he forgets that his body may suffer. Of course there are fears. Only the feeling of fear encourages, strengthens the desire to perform a risky experiment. Adolescence, for most children, is characterized by little concern for their own health. At this age there is a lot of energy, the body’s recovery after exercise occurs quickly. Life seems long. Values ​​associated with a healthy bodynot fully formed. Teenagers view the value of health as a way to achieve certain goals. There is a lot of curiosity about physical experiments on the body (piercings, tattoos, the first cigarette). A teenager does not know how to think about the consequences. He is interested in life here and now. A teenager thinks in the current moment: he does not see consistency and continuity between what is now and what will happen someday. Judgments about the present and views into the future are limited to a period of several months: the end of the quarter or academic year. The prospect of entering another educational institution, acquiring a profession, or a family is perceived by a teenager as another, adult life. Therefore, appeals addressed to them with discussions about the future and the consequences of their actions are now of little effect. It is more effective to talk with a teenager about what is now, explaining that the future itself does not come from nowhere, but is predetermined by the present. 3. Identification with a specific character, social role or group of people. It starts out like a game. The teenager tries on different roles. He changes his clothes to flashy ones, to ones that distinguish him as belonging to some youth movement, puts distinctive marks on his body, and changes his hairstyles. Changing himself, the teenager looks for the image that is closer to him, which is no longer forbidden. What is so attractive about imitation, about identification? The teenager shares the behavior patterns accepted by the object of identification, reads and demonstrates them. Various options for behavioral and external imitation are only the surface layer: “I behave like them!” The deeper meaning of identifying a teenager is to obtain a model of emotional response to certain life events. With the help of this model, a teenager becomes able to manage his emotions and express them. The danger is that as a teenager grows up, he may get stuck in this image for some time, thereby slowing down his development path. For the first time, a teenager has new emotions, feelings that completely captivate him. He is capable of feeling extremely happy or unhappy. These emotional experiences are enhanced by hormonal changes in the body and seem global. He himself cannot understand these powerful experiences and does not always understand what is happening to him, and cannot always understand the reasons for this. He experiences many feelings for the first time! First love, betrayal, disappointment, excitement, shame, delight - a whole kaleidoscope of feelings. A teenager wants to be the master of his subjective experiences. Identification provides an ideal model: what feelings to experience, at what moment, when to be happy, when to be unhappy. And this happens in a circle of like-minded people, which in itself is significant for a teenager. It is pointless to fight these mechanisms. Since they are natural for a teenager. He learns to live on his own. Adults often see the source of problems in the fact that the teenager has chosen the wrong object for identification: “The wrong music is playing in his room, the wrong idols, bad friends.” A growing child always has a choice: which society to prefer. The company does not force anyone to join in. The reason for choosing a “bad” company is the lack of an alternative company that would conduct socially acceptable activities that are emotionally attractive to a teenager. Don't underestimate the intelligence of teenagers. If they have a choice between a company with primitive interests (gathering in a basement with beer), or one that is more active (going on a hike with an overnight stay, a campfire and a song with a guitar), he will choose the second, especially since it is more emotionally attractive . Teenagers often complain: “These parents have only two questions: What did you get? And what is asked? But what’s really happening to me doesn’t interest them!” Resentment towards adults appears. In adolescence, communication with peers is of particular importance. Peers are perceived as authority figures. Teenagers often share their.