Our rapprochement is like climbing a ladder: step by step we become closer. In this article I tell you what steps we need to go through and how to do it faster. And at the end, catch 9 steps for getting closer. 5 levels of communication There are several levels at which communication between people occurs. Without overcoming the previous one, it is impossible to move on to the next one. And in this hierarchy, close relationships are at the highest level, along the way to which the interlocutors gradually pass through four stages of communication development. To understand how to transform formal relationships into close and even intimate ones, you first need to get acquainted with all levels. I’ll briefly talk about all five. Formal When used: when meeting for the first time, in official communication, in a new company. Signs: complete self-control, wearing a social mask or image, awkwardness is carefully hidden. Meaning: allows you to simply and quickly get involved in social communication and make the right impression , keeping the situation under control. Ritual When used: to maintain contact with significant people with whom you do not want to lose touch. Signs: restrained and impersonal communication out of a sense of necessity, the use of “ritual” phrases to indicate the importance of the interlocutor, this also includes “likes” and ratings on social networks. Meaning: helps maintain a certain image and maintain necessary contacts. Standard When used: to maintain a balance between expressions own experiences and understanding of the interlocutor, without delving into the personal. Signs: superficial discussion of personal problems, standard advice, general jokes and topics for conversation. Meaning: allows you to feel a sense of belonging to your interlocutor or social group, to avoid the feeling of loneliness. Crisis When used: in moment of crisis in a relationship to express true and hidden emotions and experiences, removing social masks. Signs: genuine emotions (shame, fear, embarrassment, excitement), the conversation touches on new and very personal topics (promotion at work, declaration of love), there is a change in established views, a radical change in attitude towards the interlocutor. Meaning: leads to a complete change in the perception of the interlocutor, as well as the destruction of one’s own image in the eyes of the interlocutor, allowing one to establish the closest possible relationship and reach the level of basic trust in the relationship. Intimate When used: in moments of maximum openness and honesty, when establishing mutual intimacy between interlocutors. Signs: complete frankness and vulnerability, rejection of any masks and images, comfort in remaining silent together. Meaning: leads to the formation of a deep emotional connection between people. The speed of passing each of these levels is very individual, but before , how to switch to a new one, I recommend taking a short break and objectively assessing the situation. To help, I can offer a small step-by-step instruction of 9 steps that will help make the transition to a new level of communication more productive, and turn your interlocutor into a partner. How to move from formal to close relationships. Evaluate the relationship. Do they have everyday communication, who initiates it, is there pressure from a partner? Listen to yourself. How do you feel next to your interlocutor: comfort, lightness, trust? Do these feelings match your expectations? Communicate. Use different methods of communication, in addition to personal: write, call. This will help reveal the character, habits, and beliefs of your partner. Be careful. Put down your mobile phone, stop work correspondence, show that your partner is the most important to you now. Have mutual friends. In one company you are freer, so it is easier for you to get along and move one step closer. Everyday activities bring you closer. Walk the dog, cook dinner or watch a movie - this will help you get used to each other, your partner’s habits and characteristics. Everything new can only be done together. Try something new together. This is going to be great