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It is known that people don’t just become psychologists. Studying to become a psychologist means, first of all, getting to know yourself, your patterns of behavior, worked out over the years, seeing the walls and fences built that prevent you from looking at the world and interacting with it, learning your methods of defense and attack, ways of contacting other people. So I went first to help myself. As they say: first save yourself, and then help others. This thought still keeps me going. I discovered apathy in myself: I didn’t want anything and felt bad, there was some limit to the freezing of feelings. The body, of course, reacted and signaled that something inappropriate was happening. There was a feeling of rock bottom. I wanted to finally do something about this burden. I searched and didn’t find anything that would resonate. And then Gestalt itself found me. I had previously heard about this direction in psychology, but I never thought that I would come to it. That message contained everything I needed: about me, and about my future profession, and about real employment - everything that I lacked and really wanted. From that moment on, everything started to spin. It was the summer of 2014. Of course, at first I “treated” myself. The first stage involves familiarization with the method and receiving therapeutic help in a group. A year and five three-day training sessions warmed me up and showed me that it was possible to get a new profession - one that I had always liked, was close and inspiring. I felt myself and realized that I could do it. A new life began for me: I went to personal therapy, decided to further study as a professional and get to know myself as a person, an individual. At this point the question may arise: did you not know yourself before? Of course, I was a little familiar with myself :), but it was psychotherapy that helped me understand myself so clearly and consciously, see, hear, feel. And I think this process is quite long. Every time I meet with colleagues, coaches, clients, and just people in my life, I am faced with my reactions, limitations, strengths of my personality - I constantly learn something new about myself. All this helps me, as a psychotherapist, not to fall into my processes when I work with a client, to understand and accept the difficulties of my client, not to impose my understanding, to trust feelings, to believe, to support. There is such a beautiful and life-like sketch about how a client comes to us with an open wound, and the therapist already has scars. The therapist has already gone some way with his psychologist, stitching up and soothing his wounds. He has the experience of a campaign, hardships, gains, refusals, confessions, the experience of meeting himself, the present. Yes, we live our normal lives: home, work, rest. Yes, we show up in this life with other people in various ways. But it often happens that our reactions are not ours at all, but “this is how it should be,” “you should,” “what will people say,” etc. In the work of a psychologist with a client, there is a liberation from other people’s attitudes that were once necessary, but are now very close to them. And in this sense, we recognize ourselves again: what suits me? What is good for me and what is not so good? How would you like it and what is needed for this? What am I, after all? When a psychologist has recognized himself, studied his “schemes,” he can help the client discover himself, what stops him and what promotes him. He can go down to the depth that the client is ready for and be there with him, supporting.

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