Today the client came for a consultation. It's hard to talk. It's hard to be in the flow. As soon as I get lost in the conversation, there is a long pause, the words are painfully selected, and my gaze wanders. But the most unpleasant thing is that every 2-3 words an “uh” is pronounced. Is this a familiar theme? Yes, there are many such people around. When you listen to them, you simply experience a physical feeling of awkwardness, you want to help them, finish for them, find the right word, save them from the need to strain so much. But, unfortunately, this will not help them. You can't do this without independent work. Moreover, some people can cope with parasitic words in just a few days. Others will need longer work. There may be several stages. The very first stage is to begin to notice filler words in your speech. Often a person is generally surprised when he watches himself on video or hears a recorded conversation. He didn't even know he was saying that. And, most importantly, I didn’t realize what it looked like from the outside. Therefore, during our consultations, we make sure to record a video and watch it. What is important here, of course, is the presence of a specialist nearby, because often people simply begin to criticize themselves - “oh, what a horror!”, and generally get lost and do not understand what to do next. The second stage is usually difficult. You already notice parasitic words in your own speech, but you don’t have time to do anything about it. That is, you notice them after the fact, when they are pronounced. The main thing here is not to panic! Because at this stage it seems that speech consists only of such “uhs” and you feel like an eternal hostage. At our meetings this stage passes quite quickly, because in the process of regular exercises, following one after another, the ability to cope is quickly acquired with parasitic words. How to deal with them? The simplest thing is to replace the rushing “uh” with a pause and at the same time look at the interlocutor. When we insert this unnecessary word, we usually lose the thought or try to formulate it, and thus waste time. The gaze moves to the side, contact with the person completely disappears. Therefore, it is important to return to contact: look into the eyes and pause. Gestures will also help. Make any gesture. Everyone knows that hands are closely connected with speech. And our case is no exception. And the most important thing is consolidation. Always remember this (at first, but later you won’t need to). Take control of your speech. Get help from friends and family. Motivate them financially. Say - “Please watch my speech, and as soon as you hear the parasitic word, I will pay you for it, for example, 20 cents (rubles, or whatever).” Usually financial motivation is the strongest! This offer especially pleases children. Believe me, they have never listened to your words so carefully as in the hope of catching a couple of unwanted elements and not earning their bonus. Of course, this is just the main outline. In general, the presence of filler words is very closely related to the ability to speak easily and naturally , be in the flow, be able to be open and relaxed in the process of communication. All this is gained through practice. Sometimes underneath this inability lie deep psychological problems stemming from family history. Often such people are afraid of evaluation, negative attitudes towards themselves, and are very sensitive to the slightest criticism. Sometimes they simply haven’t learned how to establish relationships and are painfully afraid of any approach to themselves. Then this is worked through in therapeutic work. For example, several times it was possible to cope with clients’ stuttering by offering them psychotherapy instead of consultations on public speaking... But often it’s just a matter of the need to train. Talk, talk and talk. Notice errors and correct them. Gradually open the speech flow. Become relaxed. I wish you to speak beautifully!