From the author: From the Psychology in Sales and Business series. How to make sure that the client returns to you again and again? So that he would be pleased to spend his precious time in your company? Once upon a time, when choosing a refrigerator, my husband and I went to different household appliance stores and looked at exactly the same product in each of them, and accordingly chose which store we should buy it from. And then in one of them we came across a seller who completely charmed both of us. Of course, we bought a refrigerator in this store. And, after this purchase, we wanted to go there for the next one, without even considering the options of other stores! Why is this happening? Why do we not just buy a product, but buy a product from a specific seller? The answer is quite simple. This seller gives us what others do not give us - he captures our desires and needs. And not only those aimed at purchasing a product, but also those that Eric Berne (the founder of transactional analysis) described as a thirst for stimulus. We are talking about the need of every person for an emotional response to his existence, that is, a person’s need to be noticed and appreciated. In transactional analysis, this emotional response was called stroking. The stimulation we get from stroking plays a vital role for us. Research shows that babies who receive too little stroking not only develop at a slower rate, but may even wither away and die. And this happens despite the fact that all their physical needs are met. When we are still very small, we need physical contact, or stroking. But as we grow older, verbal strokes become more and more important, and this is what we can give to our buyer. A lack of strokes leads to a hunger for strokes, which makes people susceptible to manipulation, and their constant attempts to give them to themselves require a lot of energy. In the case of a complete lack of strokes, our situation is hopeless - we will simply “suffocate” without them, and therefore we are ready anything to get noticed. By giving strokes to our clients, we emotionally attach them to us! , because we give them what others don’t. Example: - this sofa is more comfortable and soft, easy to fold out, and this one is more suitable for an office setting. - I’ll most likely take the first one, because... I need it for the living room, where perhaps guests will also relax. - yes, good. You know how to clearly express your thoughts and ideas. Our reactions to a person - phrases, facial expressions, gestures (i.e. stroking) are divided into positive and negative, unconditional and conditional. PositiveNegative Strokes that make us feel more positive Strokes that give us negative emotions UnconditionalConditional Strokes for what we are Strokes for what we do