It’s no secret that relationships between people are built easily and simply for some, but for others it is a complex, unsolvable task. For some, relationships bring joy and pleasure, and for others, wounds and sadness. Briefly, the success of an adult relationship can be described as a set of abilities: cope with stress, stay with your emotions and withstand them, use communicative body language, be spontaneous and open, without resentment, forgive easily, refuse, etc. d. Studying the influence of emotional relationships in early childhood has made it possible to understand why a huge number of people have great difficulties in interacting with the most important people in their lives, why close relationships chronically fail to build, do not develop, or are destroyed. We were all born programmed to connect with one very significant person. a person - a mother, or that adult. which replaces it. The emotional attachment that arises between a child and his mother is the first attachment in his life. This attachment at that time is built on mutual non-verbal communication. The emotions that the child experienced then determine the style of his relationship with other people throughout his life. It was then that the foundation of future adult relationships was laid. People who experienced fear or disruption of emotional connection during their infancy often grow into adults who have difficulty understanding their own emotions and the feelings of others. Both in adulthood, and even more so in infancy, fear and destruction of emotional connections cause emotional trauma to those to whom they are directed. The deeper and stronger the impact of the trauma, the more a person withdraws into himself, the more painful the very fact of the existence of others becomes, and the greater the likelihood of receiving new traumas. As a result, we can formulate two theses, good and bad. 1- Thanks to the modern view of personality development, it becomes clear that the early relationship between a child and an adult caring for him largely determines: the success or failure of future intimate relationships, the ability to maintain emotional balance, the ability to enjoy life and being yourself finding satisfaction in relationships with others the ability to bounce back from stress, disappointment or life shock. 2- With a modern perspective on development, we can understand how to help build and develop productive and meaningful relationships. If we can determine from childhood memories and our current behavior that our problems are related to the fact that our first childhood attachment was insecure, then we can work with childhood traumas and put an end to their influence on our adult relationships. Skype consultation: tatiana .egorova978