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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

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During the course of life, a person encounters situations that undermine his trust in people. How to restore trust? I want to immediately clarify this issue. Trust is one of the basic concepts that is formed in very early infancy, from the moment of conception to 1 year. Throughout life, no one and nothing can undermine your trust. You may encounter events and people that will only intensify processes that began long before the event that caused the pain. Every person who causes us pain and suffering repeats only what has already happened in our lives. No person except our parents can destroy our trust, he can only cause pain, but not destruction. Trust is destroyed only in relationships with parents, and with trust already almost destroyed or just beginning to collapse, a person enters adulthood. A rock that is not undermined by water or wind will not collapse. Likewise, trust will not be destroyed by the actions of one person. And if there were more than one such people, then this is another question about love and trust in yourself: Why do you surround yourself with people who destroy your trust??? Are you thereby trying to reproduce a painful event each time, in the hope of a different outcome? During the period up to 1 year, the mother is the guide and the only link for the child with the outside world. The mother is not only a guide to the world, but also a mirror for the child, in which he sees himself and receives the first and most important idea of ​​himself. Only through the mother and her care does the child get an idea of ​​the world - what it is like, the world into which he was born - warm , bright, kind, joyful, calm, giving or cold, gloomy, angry, anxious, dangerous. A child’s idea of ​​the world is formed not only from the mother’s care for him, but also from her emotional state. If a mother is depressed, anxious, upset, then all her emotions and her internal state are transmitted to the child. Through her state, the child perceives information about himself, concluding in his infant unconscious that he is not wanted, no one was waiting for him here and he is not welcome here, he is the cause of all his mother’s misfortunes and suffering. The mother’s condition shapes not only the child’s idea of ​​himself, but also the idea of ​​the world as not accepting him, rejecting him and bringing danger. The issue of trust is the most important in a relationship. They say that love has a twin soul - trust. If a person has not laid the foundations of trust in himself and in the world, then real trust will not appear in any relationship. We very often associate trust with the behavior and qualities of another person. We want to see irrefutable evidence that the other person will not cause us pain and suffering, will not leave us, will not betray us. Any action undergoes a serious test, and sometimes not a very serious one - whether he (she) can be trusted or not. The slightest mistake - the conclusion - no, you can’t trust him, you shouldn’t open up too much with him, it’s better to keep your heart closed than to get it later pain. But it turns out that trust depends not so much on the actions and actions of others, but on our ability to endure pain and experience it. And the ability to experience pain depends on how mature our Self is, how much it has grown from its childhood state. In a relationship, the most frightening thing is the potential for pain, which means trust is always on guard and cannot be trusted. As soon as the ability to endure pain increases and a person is confident in his ability to endure pain with dignity, then he will trust more. In fact, the actions of other people should not undermine the value of yourself. If I am an adult, then it will not stick together with the other so much that when I lose the other, I have to tear off pieces of myself with meat and blood. Adults love each other, penetrate each other, but do not stick together. Like a wave washes a rock, filling all the voids and again connecting with water, it retreats into the depths of the ocean. Trust is the skill and ability to interact, and not enslave another into an object to satisfy one’s own.needs. Trust is a very multifaceted concept and is made up of the smallest particles. If within us there is, first of all, self-confidence, we trust ourselves and love ourselves, then when faced with betrayal, humiliation, rejection and injustice, we will experience pain, but it will be bearable. Deep self-love will allow you to maintain an inner island of stability, stability and calmness; self-love, when faced with pain, will be a saving beacon in the dark, stormy sea, where, although it is scary, the goal is visible and there is a point in moving on. When faced with suffering, the earth will not disappear from under your feet, the world will not collapse, your feet will not fry in a hot frying pan. Love and trust give people the ability to experience pain and go through suffering without tearing the foundations of the inner core. On the other hand, if a person has deep trust in himself, then there will be trust in people and the world. He will be confident in the best qualities of people and will not expect bad things about himself. We perceive other people through our own prism. As you know, our fears always pave the way for the actions of other people. As a rule, something happens to a person in life that he is afraid of. Self-confidence also means the ability to trust your inner voice, your intuition. Very often a quiet inner voice tells us something, but due to self-distrust, we never listen to what it tells us. Because of momentary pleasure and the apparent satisfaction of our needs, we agree to what we absolutely do not need in life. The lack of self-love and trust attracts the appropriate people into our lives, we attract what corresponds to our internal vibrations. How to restore confidence? Trust does not need to be gained, it needs to be restored. A child is born into the world with absolute trust and love; in the process of interaction, he loses the miracle that is given to everyone by nature. Each direction in psychology has its own methods and means for gaining trust. I, in turn, deeply believe that trust can only be restored as a result of a long-term relationship with the analyst. Only in constant and long-term relationships, in a non-evaluative environment, in accepting the other for who he really is, will self-confidence be born and self-confidence be restored. The longer and deeper the relationship between the client and the analyst, the more clearly all your repressed unconscious impulses, fears, and desires appear. Only in a safe and warm, trusting environment is it possible to live through everything that has accumulated inside you over the years. The analyst knows how to contain his feelings and use them to work with the client and understand his inner experiences, which cannot be said about your partner. Trust is born in a relationship with your mother and should also be restored in a safe relationship. Only by gaining new experience in relationships is the opportunity born to transfer this experience into real life, trusting yourself, people and the world as a whole. “Complete trust Lately I have been thinking a lot about trust - partly because something had surfaced that touched a part of me that was usually safely hidden. I wonder what exactly I'm afraid of? Did I ever trust at all, or was it just a temporary illusion? How many amazing things have I destroyed through mistrust! I have always been able to cope with what I encountered in life, but the question remains open: why am I afraid? No relationship can survive without trust - be it friendship, love, work or play. It all comes down to one thing - trust. Maybe I don't really trust myself? Do I believe that I can make the right choice? Maybe? Maybe? In the end, who but me knows what is best for me? It is said that it is selfish to do what is good for you; but I know that not doing this leads to destruction. Where is the balance? And what will happen to me if I ignore my doubts and trust? Maybe it's a matter of who to trust? Looks like it didn't work, does it? I'm back where I started. And so, in a dream

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