You are reading an article from a series of abstract articles. In my opinion, there are a number of books that are effective for self-help. They are generally understandable to a reader who is far from psychology. And yet, to start reading them, you need to make up your mind. Making a conscious choice not to read is also quite an option. But how to choose without opening the book? I decided that in this case it would be useful to get acquainted with the summary and main ideas of the book. And then everyone will decide for themselves. (My opinion or reasoning is indicated in parentheses with reference to E.Yu.) What are we reading today? Janet J. Voititz Adult children of alcoholics: Family Work Relationships. beginning Adult children of alcoholics 1Chapter 1 What happened to you when you were a child? Children from families of alcoholics never fully feel like children and do not understand what it is. They can rarely completely relax and indulge in fun. Children from functional families are carefree, spontaneous and try to get encouragement without straining too much. In the family of an alcoholic, the child is assigned a role. And he is treated and treated according to it. And the child has to behave exactly like this. Role options: responsible child, scapegoat (the worst in the family), “invisible child.” Children try to play their roles well, but there is a side effect - they do not learn to understand what they really feel and how you can live in a different way. Life at home. All alcoholic families are characterized by chronic hidden tension and anxiety. Try to remember what you were thinking about when you came home. You hoped everything was fine at home, but you were never sure. If everything was not in order at home, you were never ready for it. Uncertainty was the most stable thing in your life. When your drinking father was sober, it seemed to you that he loved you. When you drank, you felt despair. With your mother, even a non-drinker, things were no better. She was usually irritable and exhausted, as if she was carrying an unbearable burden. You were an additional burden and felt guilty. If your mother suffered from alcoholism, your father tried to leave home or got a divorce. Another option is that he tried to fulfill his mother’s duties, too, while maintaining a decent façade. You could be strained by this imbalance in the family. You quickly learned to manage the household and care for the younger ones. Then they became a mother to their own mother. If both parents drank, it was even worse. The unpredictability was absolute, the tension even greater. The situation seemed hopeless to you. You dreamed of running away from home or for your parents to stop drinking. Gradually we began to live in a fantasy world. It was shameful to share the situation and therefore impossible. You became secretive. You fantasized about escaping, but you were afraid that your parents would have a really bad time without a buffer like you. If all this is familiar to you and bothers you, call 8-921-919-85-59, I work in person and online